


A Faustian Bargain

by headbanging_nightrunner



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Aatt, Additional Warnings Apply, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Aftermath of Violence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Violence, Choking, Double Penetration, Drugged Sex, Eventual Happy Ending, Explicit Sexual Content, Graphic Description, Heavy Angst, Injury Recovery, M/M, My First Work in This Fandom, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Not for the faint of heart, Other, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Torture, Warnings May Change, Whipping
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-07
Updated: 2018-06-10
Packaged: 2019-03-28 04:34:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 28,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13896351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/headbanging_nightrunner/pseuds/headbanging_nightrunner
Summary: Medieval AU. After getting in the way of the wrong noble's fun, Andrew is given the death penalty for injuring a high-born citizen. Neil goes to the prison warden to bargain for his monster's life, regardless of the cost. But what if the prize for Andrew's life is more than anyone could have anticipated. Afterall, striking a deal with a demon is never what is seems.Or: Lord Riko shows Andrew what happens to those who dare defy him and Neil is left broken nearly beyond repair





	1. Chapter One: Deal with the devil

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warnings: Graphic depictions of non-consensual sex, non-consensual drug-use and very descriptive torture/sexual violence all through this fic. So PLEASE, read at your own discretion. Special thanks to WingsOfWax and my_unlikely_hero for bearing with my incesant chatter about this AU for months! and being the best Betas ever! If you haven't already (which I very much doubt, they are excellent writers) go read their stuff ASAP.

 

**Chapter One: Deal with the devil.**

When Neil woke up that morning, he didn’t think his world would get thrown THIS out of control in less that twelve hours. Granted, he had one Minyard sibling for a lover – though of course, their relationship would be defined as _nothing_ to anyone who would dare ask- The other Minyard twin lives just down the hall, and he has Nicky Hemmick as his self-appointed “adoptive brother” yet, even when life with the infamous “monsters” (moniker they earned due to their dark pasts and terrible tempers) was never dull, it had never before been so insane as to have the possibility of losing Andrew to the gallows with the only explanation being the hastily written announcement of the county prison hand-delivered by a scrawny messenger-boy.

Neil stepped up the pace and doubled a corner, coming face to face with the imposing, shabby-looking building that was the Palmetto county prison. The read-head noticed that here and there, the plaster on the walls cracked and flaked, allowing a peek at the red bricks and mortar hidden beneath. Dark patches of moss hung to the walls, product of the relentless rains of the past month, and has he passed through the heavy wooden gates, he noticed that these were severely splintered and cracked.

Neil bowed his head slightly towards the guards posted at the entrance as he passed and reasoned that with such bleak and decaying facilities, the head warden might be more receptive to a generous donation that might deliver his blond midget safely home by the end of the day.

Neil knew better than to get his hopes up, until a couple of years ago he had spent most of his life on the run from his assassin father and had nearly died by his hand more than once. But Andrew had opened up to him, they had exchanged secrets and created a space for the both of them to spend their days, a _home_ -even though Andrew would most likely call him an idiot if he ever used that word out loud- so being able to bribe a prison warden into sparing his lovers life seemed like he most likely outcome of the day. Considering the state of the place, Neil reached the wardens office and knocked on the door, allowing himself to hope.

That was his first mistake.

The second one would prove to be pulling the warden’s door open after a low, husky voice had called a swift “come in”.

Neil walked right up to the man’s desk, with a confidence that he didn’t completely feel and stared up at the man. He was tall -but then, most of everyone was tall compared to Neil and Andrew- About 6”1 if Neil had to guess, his skin was sun-tanned and the hair of both head and beard were a startling salt and pepper for a man in his early to mid-forties.

The man scanned him up and down in return and offered him a pleased little smile that made Neil’s stomach churn unpleasantly for a moment, the warden then extended his arm and offered the shorter man a handshake.

“Evening young man.  I’m Warden Josiah Wright, and who am I talking to?”

The redhead tried to imitate Andrew’s cool, emotionless demeanor before replying.

“I’m Neil Josten”

Josiah Wright pursed his lips at that for a moment, as if tasting something. “What brings such a sweet-looking little man like you over here today Mr. Josten?”

Neil scowled at the man and his pretense of cool indifference fell, he was unamused at the jabs at his perpetually young-looking appearance and short height. Most of the time Neil hated his looks because, along with the red hair and pale blue eyes, it made him look “dainty” and “defenseless” and it had gotten him the attention of some unsavory fellows back when his anonymity was a matter of life or death. They had all been surprised to find out how vicious the _sweet little one_ could be.

Thinking back on it, Neil realized that Warden Josiah’s tiny smile a few moments ago had looked somewhat similar to those people’s leers, but he dismissed the thought immediately, so what if he was this man’s ‘type’? Josiah Wright could stare all he wanted, it would get him nowhere.

Neil stood straighter, though he knew it didn’t really help his case, he just was not a physically imposing fellow. He rummaged through the pockets of his trousers until he found the crumpled piece of paper that had brought him here, he unfolded it and extended his arm to hand it over to the other man, nearly hitting the other man in the face due to the abrupt motion.

“I have come to inquire after the meaning of this” Neil’s statement had come out with rather less bite that he had originally intended, but it didn’t matter.

The warden raised moved to take the piece of parchment from Neil’s hand “accidentally” rubbing their fingers together, the action made a small, disgusted shudder to run down the shorter man’s spine as his suspicion about the warden’s interest was confirmed.

“Ah yes, what a huge mess this entire situation, rather unpleasant evening for his lordship” Josiah Wright shrugged nonchalantly, as if the life of a man wasn’t on the line. A man who happened to be a public servant for that matter.

Neil felt his temper flare “Unpleasant for _his lordship_?!” Neil inquired hotly, having no patience for the man’s annoyingly blasé attitude.

“A man has been sentenced to the gallows for _fighting_ ” Neil hissed “A man who happens to be a law enforcer! Or were you not informed of the fact that Andrew Minyard is a city watcher in her majesty’s civic guard?!”

The warden just smiled at him condescendingly “Oh, I was informed all right. I know Andrew Minyard is a member of the _fourth_ regiment isn’t that right?” Neil tightened his jaw and sent the man a dirty look, which was all the confirmation needed.

“Isn’t that particular regiment’s commanding officer captain Wymack?” the warden inquired.

At first Neil did not deign to answer, thinking it a rhetorical question, but when Wright remained quiet and continued to look at him inquiringly Neil responded.

“Yes, he is. And I’m assuming you knew that perfectly well from the start”

The warden lifted his arms, palms up as if to appease him. “Just looking for confirmation Mr. Josten. May I call you Neil?”

Neil’s skin crawled “Mr. Josten will do fine for now”.

The warden shrugged and sat down, motioning for Neil to do the same “I’ve heard that Wymack’s hiring criteria are slightly different from those of the other officers. He looks for the troubled youths, the orphans, whorehouse children, freed slaves and the like and hires them for half the wages offered to the other regiments, since this was the condition he was given to run his troops as he saw fit. I wonder, to which category does dear Mr. Minyard belong”

Neil knew better than to rise to this kind of bait. People always looked down at his family. They were the bastard twins of an opium addict, a mixed-blood born to a freed slave (rumored to have been a pleasure slave) and a half foreign patricide (nobody seemed to care that his father had been an infamous crime lord, smuggler and hired killer). Still, the short redhead’s reply was hissed between clenched teeth.

“That is none of your business, and it is not relevant to this case. Let’s go back to the matter at hand, which is how in the hell does public fighting deserves the death penalty, even if the person that got beat up is a high-born noble? Especially when the accused is a public servant, even if he is of low standing and little influence! I might not be the must studied person in this city but I’ve read enough to know that such an offense requires, a public apology and a fine of 50 silver coins and in the worst-case scenario, if the offended party is of high standing and deems it necessary, 20 lashes and being left exposed for public humiliation at the lashing post for 24 hours”

The thought of even that punishment made Neil feel light-headed, but it would be preferable to the present alternative, and he hoped that the warden would realize that he was not an ignorant child he could intimidate into acquiescence with lewd smiles and posturing.

Wright gave an exaggerated sigh and raised the index and middle fingers of his right hand to his temple “Usually that would be the case, yes. And I am glad to see that you know your laws Mr. Josten, every citizen should. Unfortunately, the offended in question received a most terrible beating and fears retaliation from such a clearly disturbed officer if he were allowed to walk free, he made an excellent case about Mr. Minyard’s well known temper and how this isn’t the first time  other members of the lesser nobility and the gentry have made formal complaints about physical injuries caused by officer Minyard, so it was believed that continued leniency towards these attitudes might soon become a matter of public safety where he is involved”

Neil was positively furious now. How dare this man attempt to use Andrew's past to justify taking his life because of the whim of a noble who couldn’t take no for an answer?

The redhead had gone to the market square upon first receiving the message, since that’s were Andrew had told him he would be posted for the week. He had headed straight for the stall of Andrew’s favorite sweet vendor and she had told him what had happened, both from what she had seen herself and what people closer to the scene had told her.

“It seems to me” the younger man began “That even if all those previous accusations were true, which mind you, I’m not saying they are Mr. Wright. It’s still wrong to give a civilian the death penalty basing the sentence only on the word of a petulant young lord who doesn’t know how to accept rejection”

Wrights amused indifference regarding Andrew’s fate vanished from his face “Whatever do you mean by that Mr. Josten?”

Neil smiled his own cold smirk. The one his mother had slapped him for so many times. It was his father’s smile.

“You’re not the only one who has been working today Mr. Wright. I went to the square and asked around. Andrew had been patrolling around the periphery of the market place like usual when he saw our most respectable lordship, he was getting handsy with a servant girl doing her shopping, and when she started to raise her voice because of the hands groping at her breasts and trying to get under her skirts, nobody seemed to take notice, until Andrew intervened that is. He yanked Lord Riko away from the girl and when our most esteemed lord started to insult him and try to get a hit in, Andrew punched him square in the jaw and their fight began”

Neil smiled fondly at the picture in his mind. When the witnesses had first told him, he had felt a mixture of exasperation and fury, but also of fondness, understanding and another four-letter feeling that neither of them ever put into words. Of course, Andrew had assisted the young girl, Of course he had protected her from unwanted touches and advances, even at personal cost to himself, that was just who Andrew was, and because of all the things he had gone through on the streets and with the Spear family, he would protect people from being touched in that manner against their will whenever he could.

Neil came back from his reverie and looked back at the warden, who still seemed unflappable even though he smiled no longer, the younger man slumped deeper into his chair and extended his legs to their full length, crossing them at the ankles, this time it was the redhead’s turn to give a nonchalant shrug.

“In my opinion, it would appear that the matter of Andrew’s sentence is a tad bit more complicated that Lord Riko made you think, Mr. Wright. Any of the vendors at the market today could testify to what happened, the place is not terribly big and no piece of fresh news ever escapes their attention”

At these words, some amusement seemed to make its way back into the warden’s face, though this time it seemed to be a nasty, ill-spirited version of amusement.

“Indeed, I could do that Mr. Josten but sadly, if I did, I fear I would only find a tight-lipped bunch of stall workers who were too busy doing business to pay any attention to the fight. And I know what you will suggest next, ‘let’s find the girl and question her then!’ only we will not find such a girl because she doesn’t exist”

Neil lurched forward in his chair and bared his teeth ant the older, taller man “Is this really how you hand out punishments? Do you feel any regret for all the innocent people you might have condemned unjustly? Obviously, you don’t, you are a corrupt fuck, happy to wag your tail and do as the nobles bid you, always dancing to their own merry tune!”

Josiah Wright leaned over his desk and grabbed the front of Neil’s shirt, bringing the auburn-haired man closer, their faces inches apart. Neil could smell stale beer and tobacco in the means breath and turned his head slightly to the side.

“Children should stay out of grown men’s business, especially when they don’t understand them” he purred letting his breath brush against Neil’s face “You are in over your neck Mr. Josten, and you’re facing an enemy that you have no chance of defeating”

Neil struggled and pushed himself away from the warden, taking a few steps back to put some distance between them, though the cramped office made the endeavor extremely difficult.

“Let’s speak plainly then” Neil said “Since Lord Riko seems to have covered all his bases here, I shall do my best to cover mine. Your building is nearly falling apart, your guards’ uniforms have seen better days, I heard them talk about how they have been threatened with pay cuts and fear for their income. It would seem that this fair institution could benefit from an anonymous patron. Would 1,500 gold crowns be a good place to start? Would that ensure a less severe penalty for Andrew Minyard?”

Neil had the satisfaction of seeing the warden’s eyes go wide as saucers and his jaw go slack for a whole of five seconds. His pleasure was short-lived however, since Wright soon schooled his face back into his original annoyance, now colored with a hint of suspicion as well.

“And how did such a young man as yourself come by such a fortune? Should I verify that you meet all required sanitary regulations of a particular profession?”

Neil colored involuntarily at the implication and berated himself for reacting, since this was clearly some sort of game for Josiah Wright.

“It is my family inheritance” Not technically a lie, since her mother had taken the money when they fled and there was no one left to reclaim it, and now he would happily use every gold piece that remained if it would give him Andrew at the end of the day. “And you need not worry about my health. I have a rather dull job. I’m an amanuensis, no sanitary regulations or health hazards related to that”

“Good to hear that” Wright replied “But it would seem that your job is not particularly rewarding economically. I would advice that you save your money and use it for your needs. Funerals aren’t cheap Mr. Josten”

Neil let his fist fly, hitting the surface of the desk in an uncharacteristic show of temper “Damn you! Name your price then, I will procure whatever amount you demand”

He was sure there were about a thousand more gold coins stashed away in a safe, and he could always procure more by less savory means if it came to that, but he didn’t think Wright was stupid or greedy enough to let pass 2,500 gold coins just to fulfill a noble’s whims.

The warden laughed loudly in Neil’s face, seeming to enjoy the situation immensely “I’m afraid all the gold in the world you could offer me, would not be enough to buy your dear Andrew’s life. He frustrated Lord Riko’s desire, injured his body as well as his pride, since he lost the fight to a much smaller man, beneath him in stature, birth and influence and your dearest lover did that in a public square, for all peasants to see and mock. So, you see? Lord Riko  as offered my institution an obscene amount of gold, as well as personal patronage and a marriage prospect that would better my standing much more that any superfluous amount of gold you could offer me, and the only thing I have to do is send a problematic midget the few people will miss to the gallows, I’m only sorry for you Mr. Josten, since you will be getting the shorter end of the stick.” The warden snorted as he said the last part and sent him a smile that let the shorter man know very clearly the warden held no pity for his plight.

The redhead felt his hope vanish, and only then realized how certain he had been of his chances to save Andrew with money. But he had miscalculated, big time, he had not expected a nobleman’s anger to be such a powerful influence in Andrew’s fate.

“Why would a man, regardless of all his influence, give such a great reward for the life of _one_ man. A commoner he didn’t even know existed until today?”

Wright continued to smile and stare openly at him “The noble class is very peculiar and difficult to understand to common fellows like us Mr. Josten, but it seems there is a lesson to be learned here. About how deep their grudges can run, how hot their hatred can burn and how long their reach can be. It is not a pleasant experience, to be in the receiving end of an influential man’s wrath”

“So, you will not be swayed?” Neil asked simply, feeling himself grow desperate. He would beg, he would do anything short of trading places with Andrew at the end of that noose, not because he valued his own life over his lover’s, but because he knew Andrew would never be able to live with that choice if Neil made it for him.

The warden moved, walking around his desk and closing the small distance between them in a couple of is longer strides.

“I’m afraid all the gold in the world would not be enough to change my decision, since I answer to such a powerful man. However, …”

Neil saw a flash of contemplation cross the warden’s features and he lunged for it, eager to grasp at anything that would help Andrew “I understand that he must be punished for injuring a nobleman, and that your hands are tied in that regard, but there must be SOMETHING you can do. Give him at least some leniency”

The warden seemed to ponder Neil’s words for a little while and then grinned, pressing himself close to Neil’s shorter frame.

“You didn’t let me finish Mr. Josten, I was saying that no gold would sway me or Lord Riko in regards to Mr. Minyard’s need for a lesson. However, there are other punishments he can receive and other currencies that you could bribe me with. Much more enjoyable currencies than gold”

Neil felt a knot forming in his stomach. Surely this man wasn’t implying?...

“I’m afraid I don’t get your meaning” Neil stated, trying to reassure himself that the warden wasn’t really implying what he thought he was implying. “I would appreciate it if you could speak plainly to me.”

Neil’s sentence brought a complete change into the warden’s demeanor. The man took hold of the redhead’s chin with his right hand, forcing him to look up into the older man’s face.

“I’m saying there are more delectable ways to pay for your man’s life. And if in the payment there is his punishment as well? That’s like killing two birds with one stone.”

Neil meet the man’s lewd stare squarely, making no move towards or away from him, hoping that feigning ignorance might make the man’s insinuations into an unpleasant misunderstanding.

The warden grunted in exasperation, apparently done with any pretenses of civility. He let go of Neil’s chin, grabbed him by the arm and turned him around, shoving him into the wall face first, he could feel the warden leaning towards him, could feel the man’s stale breath against his ear. All possibility of a misunderstanding gone when the hand that was not pinning his arms against his back traveled down to palm his dick over the fabric of his trousers. Neil was starting to feel nauseous.

“What do you say Mr. Josten?” Wright was speaking close to his ear, and he could feel the tip of the man’s tongue touching his earlobe as he spoke, leaving tiny, disgusting drops of saliva in his ear. “Will you spread your legs for me? To save dear Andrew Minyard’s life?”

Neil felt a bubble of disbelieving laughter trying to crawl its way out of his throat and he bit it back with determination, he would not let this man affect him.

“Is that really what you want?” Neil hoped the incredulity in his voice would hide the twinge of fear he was feeling. He had indeed thought to himself that he would pay any price for Andrew’s life, but was this really what it would take?

“I can’t see Lord Riko being too pleased if you let Andrew go just because you got your rocks off Mr. Wright”

The man scoffed “But don’t you see? It would be a perfect punishment for Minyard as well, to know another man has had your body in payment for his freedom, I don’t think he would be too pleased at such a betrayal coming from you, even for his sake, or is he the sort of fellow that would let anyone fuck his lover so long as it got him anything he wanted? I could make his lordship see the poetic beauty of such a punishment, and how much more the betrayal would hurt Minyard than any death sentence”

The warden was right. Neil’s betrayal of Andrew’s trust would hurt him more than his impending death. This was a clear break of the promises they had made, to never take mad risks that might endanger them. But Andrew’s own temper had broken his promise first, righteously or not, and now his partner’s life was hanging by a thread with the only bargaining chip anyone seemed interested in being Neil’s own body. Andrew would probably hate him for this, what with the horror Drake had made him live when the Spears had taken him in, and now Neil would offer his own body up to this man to do as he pleased? He would probably be disgusted at him.

 _So be it_ , Neil thought, _At least he’ll still be alive_.

Neil swallowed hard, trying to speak past the heavy lump in his throat. “Will you really convince his lordship to let Andrew go? If I let you do this?”

“Yes, you have my word”

 _No that your word means a whole lot to me._ But it would have to do. Neil would do this and it would be fine, and Andrew would be back home at the end of the day, it wouldn’t matter if he wanted nothing to do with Neil, he would be safe.

“All right then. I’ll do it”

As soon as he said it, Wright let go of his arms and used his left hand to yank at Neil’s auburn curls instead, twisting his neck so that he was looking up at the taller man. Wright bent over to kiss him sloppily, biting Neil’s bottom lip when the smaller man didn’t respond and shoving his mouth inside as soon as the redhead made the tiniest sound of discomfort at being bitten. Wright’s tongue was moving incessantly and Neil could feel it at the back of his throat, has if the man was trying to make him swallow it, it was disgusting, and the man was a terrible kisser. Wright kept kissing him while he lazily moved his hips, rubbing his clothed cock against the crack of Neil’s own, fully-clothed ass. His right hand travelled underneath Neil’s trousers palming his balls and tugging at his unresponsive dick. The warden stopped kissing him in order to take a few deep gulps of breath and whisper in his ear.

“Since we’re about to get very well acquainted with each other, I’ll start to call you Neil, and you might call me Josiah if you want to”

Neil said nothing, just gritted his teeth and brought his hands to the wall for support.

Wright licked his earlobe, then moved to the back of his ear and traced a line of saliva down to the nape of Neil’s neck, sucking the skin between neck and shoulder before biting down hard. Neil presses his forehead into the wall and clenches his teeth, make an effort to not making any sound.

Wright undid the buttons at the waist of Neil’s worn jerkin and threw it to the ground, moving the hand that wasn’t roughly jerking at his dick up to roam at his chest, two fingers massaging his right nipple before pinching it harshly and this time Neil can’t bite down his hiss of pain before it leaves his lips. And this seems to encourage the man behind him.

“Such a good boy Neil” The warden said, biting at the redhead’s ear “You have such a lovely voice, let me hear it some more” he yanks at the neck of Neil’s undershirt and kisses his shoulders, biting down on them a couple of times until there is blood on his skin.

Neil tries to suppress his voice as much as he can, but he doesn’t always succeed, because of how rough the hands on him were. The younger man got a brief respite when the warden’s hands ceased their abuse on his body, but he felt a stab of dread course through him when those same hands pulled down at his trousers and breeches until they dropped and pooled at his knees, Wright cupped his ass cheeks in both hands and spread them apart kneeling down so that his face was level with Neil’s ass.

“I’ll just have a little taste before the main dish, Neil. You’re such a delicious treat, I cannot help myself”

Neil gasped when he felt Wright’s tongue breech his walls, the man squeezed his ass even harder, digging his nails roughly into the pale skin, scratching red trails along the unblemished porcelain of Neil’s butt.

Wright moved his tongue in a circular motion, around the rim of Neil’s hole, he took hold of Neil’s hips and brought the redhead’s ass closer to his face, tilting his head back so that his tongue could penetrate the boy deeper. Neil felt the warden’s tongue hit a spot that made a brief flash of heat travel through his belly, but it was gone before it could fully register on Neil’s mind. Wright takes out his tongue and brings it back in several times, occasionally letting his teeth brush against his rim. Neil hisses and grunts, making an effort to hide his discomfort and the occasional prickles of pain. After a while, the warden seems to be satisfied and takes out his tongue from Neil’s ass, giving a couple of licks to his entrance before biting his ass while nuzzling into the crack of the shorter man’s bottom.

Wright stands up and turns Neil’s head towards him, forcing another of his disgusting, savage kisses into his mouth. Neil was sure that the unknown taste in the other man’s mouth had to do with where his tongue had been previously, and the knowledge made him feel queasy.

A trail of saliva joined their mouths for a moment before it snapped, and Neil didn’t know what more to expect. Had Wright had his ‘ _taste_ ’? Could he get a respite before Wright demanded his _main dish?_ Neil already felt weak-kneed and drained.

He got his answer when the warden shoved three fingers of his right hand roughly into his mouth. The man pulled his fingers in an out of his mouth several times until they were soaked in Neil’s saliva. For a moment of blind incomprehension, Neil is baffled at Wright’s actions until he sees the warden’s dripping hand travel back to his hole. Wright shoves two fingers into his hole and bites into Neil’s neck once more. The digits plunge into Neil’s being, widening his hole further with Wrights scissoring motions, the warden retreats his fingers until only the tip remains at his entrance, then brusquely shoves both fingers back in until the second knuckle, as deep as they could go. He feels the man’s sharp nails scratch his walls and again, the fingers hit that spot that made Neil feel that uncomfortable warmth. The redhead cried out in pain, unable to suppress his voice anymore, and he felt a treacherous tear travel down his cheek.

“Shhh, don’t cry Neil” the warden cooed, in a mocking attempt to sound soothing “Such a beauty shouldn’t shed tears, unless they are of pleasure? In that case I would prefer that you moan for me darling.  Hang in there, it won’t be long now”

Wright licks his tear away and gives a few more thrusts with his fingers before, true to his word, he pulls them out. The older man let’s go of Neil and he slides down the wall, crossing both arms over his torso to try and pull himself together.

Wright ruffles Neil’s hair “that was a good start dearest, though I have to say I’m a bit sad you didn’t enjoy it”

The warden motioned vaguely at Neil’s flaccid cock before shrugging, he headed to his office’s door before looking back at the smaller man.

“I need to take care of some business really fast, and send a message to his lordship to justify your lover’s new verdict. Shouldn’t take more than half an hour, oh and don’t bother rearranging your clothes too meticulously, I’m going to take them off anyway, just pull your trousers back on for now”.

Neil did and headed to sit on one of the chairs in the office, because of this, he failed to notice the warden’s wicked grin as he headed towards the prison’s infirmary.

* * *

 

Josiah Wright walked away from his office with the warm taste of Neil Josten still fresh in his memory.

The younger man was delectable, and he couldn’t wait to experience the delight of his body in full. But first, there were a couple of things that needed to be done.

He headed to the infirmary. Where his lordship Riko Moriyama was nursing a bruised face and a wounded pride. The man was of course playing up his injuries for his whole charade, but all his money assured that people were eager to wait on him.

He knew he had taken a huge risk at striking a deal with the short redhead without consulting Lord Riko first, but from the moment he had seen Neil Josten, he had felt the desire to taste his delicious warmth, and the man was so clearly desperate, it had just been too easy.

Besides, he had seen the red-hot fury in Lord Riko’s eyes when he had to look at Andrew Minyard when giving his testimony, his lordship would pounce at the chance of lingering pain and betrayal for the short blond, and at the hands of his lover no less.

He walked through the infirmary door and headed straight for the lord’s bed, the man was putting on a rather poor show, trying to play up his injuries while the other prison officers were still around, but their shift would be over in about a quarter of an hour, so he shouldn’t need to keep up his charade too long.

“Good evening milord”

Riko gave him a sideways glance and sat up from the bed “What do you want Wright?”

“So direct your lordship, can’t I come pay you a visit only for the delight of your exalted company?”

Lord Riko arched an eyebrow “I do not know, is that really what this is?”

“Not really. You will be happy to know that Andrew Minyard’s paramour, Neil Josten, has come to us to plead for mercy for his partner’s life”

“Why do I care?”

“Well, because, after failing to bribe me with gold, he quite willingly offered to pay for the man’s freedom with his body. Freely given for our personal pleasure.” Wright grinned at the lord, who still seemed uninterested.

“I can get a whore to pleasure me anytime I wish without having to give up anything that would bring me the relief of making that blond bastard suffer”

“Which is why we should take his offer” the warden insisted “Imagine how Minyard would suffer if he knew his lover whored himself out to the two men he hates most in exchange for his life, I think that would torment him more that the prospect of a few hours of death row before being sent to the gallows, he didn’t seem to care much for his life being forfeit, he even smiled when the sentence was read to him, but he objected when it was proposed to bring his brother and cousin to testify about his character. He is protective of his people, which is why this would be a harder blow for him. Neil Josten’s body is the means of both our payment and Minyard’s punishment”

Lord Riko considers this for a moment before making and abrupt gesture with his hand for one of the guards posted at the door. The man approached briskly and bowed to the lord.

“Milord?”

“Go to the warden’s office, there’s going to be a redheaded man there called Neil Josten, take him to a private cell that is close to Andrew Minyard, but not too close, make sure the door is closed but open the porthole and the food slot so that sound can get out. Go”

“Yes milord”

“Why move him to a confinement cell close to Minyard?”

“So that the short bastard can hear his screams while we take turns fucking him, but the cell will be far enough away so that he can’t distinguish his voice. And even _IF_ he does, he will not be able to stop it.”

“Screams milord?”

“Oh, he will scream I will make sure of it. I’m going to fetch some things, to play with our little bird. Anything you need?”

“Couldn’t get a reaction out of him, so I’m going for some elixir of Linden & Damiana, that should do the trick”

“There is a flask of it in the medicine cabinet. Which makes me question what sort of medics and officers you have in your employment that would have a whore’s drug so near at hand. But it works to our benefit for now”

“Well then” The lord said, dark amusement coloring his features “I will go for my toys and we can get started. I want to leave Andrew Minyard with a present that he will really appreciate”

“If I may milord?”

Lord Riko rolled his eyes and looked to him “What is it now Wright?”

“Well, I would like to ask for his lordship to give me the benefit of breaking the boy in? Have him to myself for a little while? Since it was I who thought of this plan?”

“Have it your way, I need to fetch everything I need. I will give you an hour, then I will go and knock on your door three times”

“Many thanks, my lord”

They went their separate ways, warden Wright stopping only a moment to pocket the ‘whore’s drug’ as his lordship had so eloquently put it.

Then he headed towards the cell were Neil Josten awaited him

* * *

 

Neil was still reeling at the turn of events when the guard came with direct orders from the warden to be led to a confinement cell, he didn’t understand why, but the guards attitude and rough handling left no room for discussion.

Once he was inside the cell, the officer turned around and closed the door, bolting it from the outside with a metal bar. The soldier opened the porthole and the food slot at the bottom of the door before walking away.

Neil sat in the uncomfortable sleeping cot and allowed his mind to wander for a while. He was slightly sore from his previous activities with the warden, but the sting in his neck, shoulders and ass was easily ignored. He had had worse before. Much worse. He could handle this, for Andrew he _would_ handle it.

He was still surprised at himself, he never thought he would be able to do this, offer up his body for the pleasure of strangers, for anyone other than his blonde monster . But he shouldn’t be surprised, Andrew wasn’t just anyone, and he had changed his life from the time they met.

Thus, lost in his contemplations, he missed the sound of the door bolt and came back to himself only after the door creaked open and warden Wright walked in, closing the door behind him. The man stalked close to Neil, looping one arm around Neil to bring their chests close together, he bent down and kissed the boy, again with too much tongue. Why did this man like kissing so much anyway?

Wright gripped his ass in one hand and squeezed with a bruising grip, using his other hand to tear Neil’s shirt off.

“Take off your boots” he commanded, and sat on the cot, eyeing Neil with lustful eyes, he took off his own coat, jerkin and shirt, leaving his upper half bare. He spread his legs farther apart and palmed his clothed cock, rubbing it fiercely while beckoning with his arm for Neil to move closer to him, when Neil´s steps proved too hesitant for his liking, he tugged at his arm and brought the boy to stand between his legs taking hold of the redhead’s hand, guiding it beneath his trousers to unwillingly massage the warden’s cock, guided by the older man’s hand.

“That’s it Neil, you’re so good at this. A natural” Neil kept stroking the man’s cock, even when Wright pulled his hand away to rest it on the smaller man’s shoulder. He didn’t know when Wright would make him stop but he assumed something had to happen soon, since the man’s cock was standing erect now.

“Take off my trousers” the warden demanded, and once Neil did as he was told, he used the hands on the redhead’s shoulders to force him to his knees.

Wright guided the tip of his stiff cock to Neil’s lips, one hand still on his shoulder while the other one carded through his auburn curls “I think you know what to do, and just a warning, if you bite me, Minyard still dies”

Neil steeled himself and opened his mouth, letting the man’s thick shaft breach his lips.

Wright used the hold on his hair to make sure Neil’s mouth encased his cock to the base, pushing the younger man’s face until his nose hit the man’s untrimmed pubic hairs

“Come on honey, put that mouth of yours to good use, make me come or it will get bad for you”

Neil thought that this was bad enough already but made no comment. He licked along the length and hollowed his cheeks bobbing his head back and forth as Wright pulled at his hair. The warden started to moan, voice loud and husky, his hips bucking against Neil, making the redhead fight against the instinct to gag.

“S-so close. I’m g-going to co-come” he groaned, tugging at Neil’s auburn strands, within seconds Wright twitched in his mouth, shooting a hot load of his detested seed into Neil’s mouth. Wright’s semen felt slimy and hot in his mouth and the bitter taste of it made the redhead want to barf, but the thought of what might happen to Andrew if he angered the warden by puking allowed him not to gag.

 The older man used his auburn hair to pull him off his cock with a wet pop, staring deep into Neil’s blue orbs, Wright used the tip of his cock to smear some of his come around the boy’s mouth and chin and smiled a wolfish grin, delighted by the picture of debauchment that neil painted with his body.

“Swallow it” he ordered, pressing a finger to Neil’s lips.

Neil tried but white strings of come still slid past his lips and down his chin. The taste of the man’s come was terrible, and he hoped he would not be forced to do that again.

The warden hissed angrily, obviously dissatisfied with his performance and punched him hard enough across the face to send him reeling. Neil could taste the coppery tang of blood in his mouth.

“Such a wasteful child” he admonished “You should be a good boy and eat everything you are given”.

Wright was very obviously not done, anger momentarily forgotten, he guided Neil to the cot and pushed him to his back, he peeled Neil’s own trousers and undergarments off, throwing them into the same pile his clothes were in. The older man seemed to get great pleasure in entangling their limbs together as if they were loves, while he forced Neil’s hand to work his shaft back into an erection.

As soon as he was hard again, Wright seemed desperate to get off, since he bent Neil’s legs until his knees where parallel his shoulders, he spread both legs as far as they would go, exposing Neil’s hole, which was still tender from the man’s previous abuse. He felt the tip of the warden’s cock at his entrance and a small gasp escaped his lips.

 “Relax” The warden said, husky and low “If you stay that tense it will hurt more”

Neil knew the man didn’t care about him, only about his own pleasure.

Wright pushed roughly in without any kind of preparation, and a searing pain took hold of Neil’s lower body, the agonizing feeling was so bad that for a moment, Neil feared that his insides might be torn in half. He let out a shrill scream before he was able to control his voice.

“S-stop” he begged in a breathy, shaky voice.

“I won’t. We made a deal remember, you wanted this. You asked for it, now let me hear your lovely cried” the warden’s voice sounded strained and his teeth were clenched shut.

Wright groaned on top of him, shoving his dick all the way into Neil and holding still only for the briefest of moments before he began to move his hips, setting a brutal pace that had the redhead pinned under him grunting and moaning in pain, which the man took as encouragement. He pulled out until only the tip of his penis remained inside Neil’s hole, then plunged back in roughly, his thrusts continuing with their unforgiving speed.

At one point, Wright bent Neil’s knees until they were touching his shoulders, holding the back of his thighs so tightly that Neil could feel the nasty bruises forming, this angle brought a whole new level of agony for him. Wright then placed both of the shorter man’s legs atop his shoulders to free his hands, he used one to play with Neil’s nipples and the other to scratch a scarlet path down the man’s scarred torso.

“S-so many scars Neil. Seems like you have l-lead an interesting life. Ngh!”  Wright kept ramming into him, over and over and over, plunging savagely into him until his balls were bouncing at Neil’s entrance not soon enough, his thrusts became erratic and shallow and Neil knew it would be over soon.

With a final thrust and a loud moan, Wright came inside him, painting Neil’s walls with his hot semen. Neil could feel it within him and he hated it. The warden dislodged the redhead’s legs from his shoulders and let them rest on the cot, then collapsed on top of him. The older man nipped harshly at Neil’s split bottom lip and rested a hand at the hollow of his neck.

“Now then, that wasn’t so bad was it?”

 _Yes, it was. And I am glad it is over_.

Andrew would see the marks in his body and he would hate him. Probably even more that he already hates himself. For allowing this man to have his body like this, in a way that Andrew’s limits and his own had very rarely allowed them to enjoy.

Neil came back into his body when Wright’s weight lifted off of him. He pulled out of him with a wet squelch that Neil worked hard to ignore, along with the sensation of warm fluids sliding down his thighs.

Wright gave a low whistle as he stared at his lower half, he ran a hand along Neil’s thighs and when he brought it up for inspection, it came away soaked in a mixture of blood and semen. The warden made no comment

At last it was over. He was done.

Wright got up and walked to their pile of discarded clothes from which he retrieved a corked bottle made of green glass. The warden’s back was to him, but he saw the man uncork the bottle and rise it to his lips, inclining it slightly, making Neil think that he had drank from it.

Very soon, that would prove to be yet another mistake.

The warden walked back to him and extended his arm, offering the bottle to him.

“Take a sip, I think you need it after that work out”

Neil accepted the bottle, eager for anything that would help erase the lingering taste of Wright’s semen from his mouth. In his shaken state, he threw precaution to the wind and hastily gulped down two huge mouthfuls of the strange tasting wine, leaning back into the wall of the cell with a sigh, he turned his face away from Wright and waited for the man to get dressed and get out so that he could do the same. When minutes kept passing and he didn’t do it, he started to get annoyed. He turned back towards the man to ask just what the hell he was waiting for when he noticed that even that small effort had left him dizzy and panting. He felt hot and sweaty, and his senses were dulling, going numb, it wasn’t until Wright pushed him down onto his back again that he realized that this was nowhere near over. He saw Wright looming ominously on top of him and turned his head away, looking at the door with a fierce sense of longing and hope.

_I am so sorry, Andrew. Forgive me…_

He didn’t say please. Even in the haze of the spiked wine he remembered how much Andrew hated that word.


	2. Enter the raven lord

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil had agreed to Wright's deal, but he hadn't know about RIko. Now the Lord Moriyama has come to collect his dues.  
> Trigger warnings for graphic depictions of torture and sexual violence ahead guys, read with caution.

Neil’s mind felt foggy and confused, and for a while he was unable to remember where he was or what was happening. In the high of the drug, Neil Abram Josten’s self and been set adrift in an ocean of sensation, and all he knew was that his skin prickled uncomfortably and his entire existence was ablaze.

His body was too hot, beads of sweat ran down his pale skin and plastered his head to his skull. His heart was hammering into his ribcage, as if trying to escape, and he was breathing so hard it was very nearly painful. Worst of all was the searing pit of lust coiling in his stomach and nether regions, his need refusing to ebb in the slightest bit, even when he could feel Andrew moving inside him. It wasn’t enough.

Neil groaned in frustration and started to move his hips to meet Andrew’s thrusts, searching for much needed friction. He was so out of it that their bed seemed a lot smaller, and the usual comfort of their sheets now felt like sandpaper rubbing on his skin. He his hands around the mattress and was surprised at how thin it felt and then realized that for some reason their sheets were missing, this train of thought however was derailed by a deeper thrust from Andrew.

He moaned. They rarely made love like this, their countless issues, boundaries and limits rarely allowed for this type of intimacy and Neil usually relished every second of it. Except right now, it wasn’t enough. He needed more, faster and deeper, he needed to beg Andrew to make him see stars. He turned his head to tell his monster as much and realized that he was on his side, one leg up in the air while the other encircled Andrew’s torso, this position was new to them, but he didn’t mind, it felt good, but he needed to feel even better.

“Harder” he begged “I n-need more, Andrew” his eyes finally locked on his lover as he pleaded, but when he took in his lover’s appearance, he realized something was wrong.

The man pounding into him was too tall, too tan, his eyes too dark and his salt and pepper hair was wrong.

This was not Andrew. He was not making love with Andrew.

Then he remembered.

Andrew’s arrest, his death sentence, the trip to the prison and the deal with Wright.

He had willingly betrayed Andrew. He still was. And it seemed that he was even enjoying it now.

He felt Wright give a deeper thrust inside him, hitting the bundle of nerves that had Neil gasping and arching his back, his hole unconsciously clenching around the warden’s thick shaft.

“I’m not your Andrew” Wright panted, turning his head to sink his lips into the thigh that rested in his shoulder, leaving some ugly love bites in Neil’s white skin.

“You have such a lewd voice when you beg, Neil” The warden chuckled, lowering his hand in order to encase and restrain the smaller man’s painful erection “Though I would prefer it if you screamed my name instead of his, since you seem to like my cock so much”

 Neil glared at him but said nothing, fearing that if he opened his mouth he would beg for Wright again.

The warden kept ramming into him at a punishing pace, pulling out until only the tip of his dick remained inside Neil, then sinking back into the tight warmth of his hole with deep thrusts of his hips that always managed to hit Neil’s prostate head on.

Before long, Neil was a panting, sobbing mess as he laid on the cot, his erection still constrained within Wrights fist, denying his orgasm.

“I-I c-can’t” Neil pleaded, voice tight with need “L-let me come, I n-need to.”

Wright’s fist clenched harder, another tantalizing thrust hitting his overstimulated prostate, this time Neil was unable to suppress his moan.

“Ahh! B-bastard, you’ve had your fun, l-let me c-come”

“Beg” Wright demanded “Call my name and beg me to let you come”

Neil knew deep down that he shouldn’t. He didn’t _want_ to beg Wright for any sort of pleasure, but the denial of his release was physical agony, and Neil’s body felt so hot and tight, it felt as if he might crack and crumble apart at any second.

“Beg!” the warden insisted.

“let me come, let me come, please!”

“Say my name Neil, say it!”

“W-Wright. Please Wright let me come” Neil felt disgusted for giving in, for allowing Wright to affect him like this, but he felt as though he would pass out if he didn’t come.

“Josiah” The warden corrected “Call me Josiah and ask again”

Neil wailed in frustration but corrected himself “Please, J-Josiah. Please let me come”

“Such a good boy. Here’s your reward”

Wright let go of his cock, and with one last deep thrust had Neil screaming in ecstasy as he came, his toes involuntarily curling in pleasure as his body unwillingly clung to Wright.

 Neil heard knocks at the door but he paid them no mind. He was still gasping for his every breath, his heart drumming a painful rhythm against his ribs. Wright hastily pulled out from him and left him lying on the cot, still on his side. As the warden got up and walked to the door, the redhead noticed that the other man was still hard and hadn’t come inside him.

 The door opened and a man Neil did not recognize walked in. He was of average height, with black hair and dark, slanted eyes that suggested Asian roots. He was richly dressed and carried himself with an air of condensing superiority that immediately put the younger man on edge. At the door’s threshold stood a blonde, green-eyed man carrying a sack, who looked pale and slightly disturbed. The dark man turned slightly and extended his hand, and the blonde immediately handed over the sack.

“Stay by the door Jean, keep watch and make sure no one comes in. No matter what they hear. I’ll let you know when I need you”.

Neil shuddered at that statement, a bad feeling washed over him. Whoever this man was, he had something planned, and the redhead guessed that it would be bad for him.

Wright turned from the Asian man to look back at him again, finally remembering that Neil still lay in the cot, weak and confused and aroused. Wright smiled at him and made a motion towards the new arrival.

“Neil, I want to introduce you to his lordship Riko Moriyama, Baron of Castle Evermore. He’s the one that pressed charges against Minyard, so you better be as good to him as you’ve been to me, dearest. We’re going to have a great deal of fun together”

At the news of the man’s identity, Neil’s mind cleared for a brief moment, a deep flash of anger momentarily lifting the haze of drugged arousal from his mind. This man could not be here, after all he had cost him and Andrew he could not be here. He would not allow this man to touch him, Riko Moriyama would not hold him. He had made his deal with Wright, and even that had proved to be more that he had originally bargained for. But he would be damned if he allowed Andrew’s worst enemy to dirty his body like this. Andrew would surely never be able to let that go.

Lord Riko dropped the canvas sack at the foot of Neil’s cot and looked down at him, a disdainful sneer plastered on his face, as if Neil’s sole existence was an unforgivable offense to him. The hatred in his eyes burned darkly and as he leaned closer, Neil was able to appreciate the darkening bruises on the man’s face, as well as a black eye, all curtesy of Andrew.

 _Good_ , he thought, _serves you bastard right._

Riko Moriyama threw a lightning fast punch square into Neil’s face, causing the redhead’s face to collide into the wall behind him. He felt blood sliding down his nose and has he took his hand to it, he found that the spot was tender and painful, but he was fairly certain that his nose wasn’t broken.

“So, _you_ are that unhinged bastard’s kept whore, can’t say you’re much to look at, but it will still be fun to shatter you and deliver your broken pieces directly into Minyard’s hands”

Riko smiled wolfishly and lifted Neil up to face him by savagely pulling at his hair, he leaned into the smaller man’s face and whispered.

“I’m going to make you scream until you lose your voice, princess, and Minyard will be helpless to stop it. Feel like begin before we resume our game?”

Riko’s face was so close to his, he really couldn’t help his actions. Neil spat right into his eyes and felt a petty rush of happiness at seeing his spit dribble down the bastard’s face.

He expected another blow and was surprised and slightly disturbed when it didn’t happen. Riko only smiled and turned back to Wright.

“I had thought to break him in a little, like you have, but it seems to me that he’s feisty enough to handle what I have in store for him”

“What do you have in mind milord?” Wright enquired, seeming genuinely curious if slightly apprehensive.

Riko reached for the bag and opened it, displaying the contents on the cell’s floor, there were several whips, Neil identified a riding crop and a metal-tipped cat-o’ninetails, there were also several knives and daggers, a length of rope, and old mallet, some rusty nails a funnel and a dark glass bottle and even a cudgel. Riko inspected each item closely before placing it down on the dirty floor until his entire collection formed a perfect row next to the cot. After he appraised the whole set up he turned to Neil with an assessing gaze.

“You know. In the pleasure district, whore’s that are too feisty receive some very useful training. They are beaten into submission by their masters. We’re about to find out how well it works with you.”

Riko finally settled upon the cudgel and the cat-o’ninetails, picking them up from his assortment of weapons and taking them with him to Neil’s cot.

“Where are close to Minyard’s cell you know? Close enough that he will hear you if you scream. Why don’t you put on a show for him? I bet that filthy gutter bastard is into that kind of thing”

And then the pain began. Riko rained blows down on him with the cudgel. The blunt force of each hit had Neil reeling after a while. He tried to protect his ribs by curling into a ball, but the lord still managed to land heavy punches into them, and Neil could only hope that none of them fractured. A particularly hard swing to his head sent him face first into the floor, and this time his nose _did_ break, he hit his head so hard that his vison went black around the edges for a moment, and before he could question how it happened, he was lain back in the cot as Wright held him down, so that Riko could continue to strike at any surface his cudgel could reach. He hit his head once more, and his knees, ribs, hips, arms and legs were pummeled so viciously that Neil’s whole body was a source of pain.

After a while Riko either got tired of swinging the cudgel around, or he got bored by its limited possibilities for pain, because he discarded it onto the floor.

Neil was proud of himself. He had not screamed once during his beating. He had grunted and bitten into his already busted lip so hard that it was bleeding, but it didn’t really matter since his whole face was already painted crimson due to his broken nose. Riko had wielded the cudgel with savage ferocity, so Neil did not thing he would be able to lift himself from his cot anytime soon, but this had not been remotely as bad as some of his father’s most cruel lessons. Lord Moriyama’s beating did not compare to the one’s his father used to give him.

Riko appeared unfazed by his lackluster response but seemed to take his relative silence as a challenge. The lord took the iron-tipped whip in both hands and moved so that Neil could look at the object a bit closer.

“Ready to start begging now, whore?”

“Fuck you” Neil spat, with as much strength as he could muster.

“That comes after. First, we are going to play with another one of my toys”

Neil was able to hear the cracking sound of the whip across the air before the first blow registered, the iron appendages at the tip of the cat-o’-nine-tails tore the skin off his back with each agonizing lash. Neil could feel the blood on his back, and the pain kept escalating with furious crack of the lordling’s whip, until his restrain shattered and he let out a small noise of pain. Riko laughed tauntingly.

“What is it Josten? Can’t handle anymore? I’m in a better mood already, so if you beg me nicely the pain will stop”

Neil scoffed derisively “I won’t beg for a petty sack of dirt that uses his title to win the fight’s that his own strength never will”

That statement seemed to renew Riko’s spirits, since more blows rained down on his back and legs, Neil could not restrain his grunts and moans of pain anymore, but he at least tried to keep his voice down, hoping that Riko had lied about how close they were to Andrew, but unwilling to chance bringing this particular pain down upon his lover.

At some point, his flogging ended and he could hear Riko huffing with exertion somewhere behind him, but he could not move to try and pinpoint his exact location. Neil’s whole body throbbed in agony, and his skin felt like fire for reasons that had nothing to do with Wright’s drug.

Riko bent down and turned him on his side, making the redhead gasp quietly due to surprise and pain, the older lord smiled wickedly and cackled, amused for reasons that Neil couldn’t hope to understand.

“Look at you Nathaniel, you are quite literally a bloody mess”

Neil’s eyes widened at the use of his birth name. No one had addressed him as Nathaniel in years. Only Andrew, Nicky and Aaron even knew who his father had been before he killed him, so how could Lord Riko Moriyama know about who he had once been?

“You seem surprised” Riko continued smugly “The Butcher owed allegiance to my father, so I glanced upon him once or twice and you’re the spitting image of him Nathaniel. When I looked at you I immediately knew who you were, which made this entire deal all the better, since you should have belonged to me anyway. You are mine to break, and once I’m done with you, that bastard Minyard won’t ever want to even glance your way”.

Riko turned to Wright, who had remained sitting as a silent spectator while his lordship beat the younger man into a more pliant disposition.

“Do you still have some of that wine?” Riko asked the warden “It seems that our little game made Neil lose his enthusiasm.”

“Yes milord. I’ve got it right over here” Wright stood up and reached the glass bottle in two of his long strides, he seized it and turned back towards Riko who grabbed it without hesitation and turned back towards Neil.

“It won’t do for me if you don’t feel anything. I want you to remember this day for the rest of your miserable life. Remember how you begged for us to fuck you in exchange for Andrew Minyard’s life. Remember how you asked for and enjoyed the feeling of our cocks inside you, all in order to save that bastard, and in the end, you will still lose him, because after we’re done with you, you’ll be too dirty and disgusting even for that blonde sewer-rat to love”

After that, Riko attempted to pry Neil’s mouth open, but even miserable and wounded as the redhead was, he still fought to keep his lips clamped shut. Riko slapped him in annoyance, but the younger man still resisted, until the lord yelled at Wright to bring him something from his canvas bag. Riko pressed a hand against Neil broken nose, which caused another wave of pain to eventually wash over him, and eventually managed to make him open his mouth to breath. Lord Moriyama shoved a funnel so deep into his mouth it scratched the inside of it and made him gag several times. Wright approached the cot and held him down while Riko poured most of the remaining contents of the bottle into Neil’s mouth, forcing him to swallow or choke.

Neil coughed and gagged once the funnel left his mouth, despising the horrible sensation that had left him gasping for breath. He tried to control himself, since the sudden movements and his ragged breaths were agony for his body, particularly his cracked ribs. When he managed to calm himself down, he slumped back into the cot and noticed the beginning of the foggy warmth descending upon him again.

_No, not again. I don’t think I can do this anymore._

“That should get you in the mood again Nathaniel. The night’s still young and there’s a lot of fun to be had yet. For us at least.”

Neil’s mind succumbed to the fog once more, and details became blurry and jumbled. He knew that Riko somehow managed to position him onto his knees, head resting on the cot and unresponsive arms unable to bare his weight, Riko had barked and order at Wright and immediately, Neil felt his airway blocked by a piece of rope being tied tightly around his throat. He struggled, summoning strength he didn’t think he possessed and trying to fight through the pain of his recent torment, he attempted to claw at the rope to no avail, Riko pulled it to position Neil nearly upright, so that his flayed back hit Riko’s torso, the redhead could feel the hardness of the taller man’s member pressed against his lower back.

“You know, it’s good that animals have some spirit in them, makes it more fun to break them, but when they are too stubborn? Then it’s time to make them understand that they are nothing but slobbering beasts”.

At some point, Riko had procured a horse’s riding crop, and as he breached Neil’s entrance, he started to hit Neil’s thighs and ass with it. One hand held the rope, and lord Moriyama pulled at it and kept maneuvering the redhead as if he were an animal. There was an agony of pain as each blow landed at his sensitive skin, as black spots danced around his field of vision, but each rough thrust that hit his prostate also had Neil drooling due to the intense sensations that travelled through his body, garbled noises left is mouth as he tried to breathe, and he couldn’t tell anymore if they were a product of his blinding pain or the horrid pleasure that he was feeling, in spite of how disgusted he was.

It went on for so long, Neil couldn’t even tell how much time had passed. Riko fucked into him until he came with a strangled grunt, all the while landing blows with his riding crop as he steered and pulled the rope at Neil’s neck as if it were a handle. As if his lordship was just riding and disciplining a wild horse until he could break it. At some point he must have passed out due to lack of oxygen, or maybe it had been the intensity of his orgasm when he came at last. All he knew was that the blessing of unconsciousness had been cut way too short before he was forced into a new position.

While Neil had been passed out, Wright had moved close to him and the Lord Moriyama. The warden looked paled and seemed reluctant to be in such close proximity to Riko, but the man knew better that to ignore his lordship’s whims, and if it meant that he could get his hands on Neil again, all the better.

The warden and the lord sat close to each other on Neil’s cot and manhandled the younger man into a sitting position. The redhead felt dizzy, his whole body throbbed and ached due to the beatings and lashings, and when he looked at himself he saw a numerous new cuts and bruises, as well as a significant amount of blood that ran down his arms, and back from the whipping, as well as down his thighs due to Wright and Riko.

Wright knelt on the cot, his torso resting on the wall, his legs spread enough apart to fit Neil between them, who slumped boneless into the warden’s torso, too tired to move from the position he was placed in.

“It’s time for our main event Neil” Wright whispered into his ear, the man’s breath ruffling some stray copper hair strands “You’ve been a pretty good fuck so far, but we’re sure you can do even better than this”

Wright lifted Neil into his lap and caressed along the redhead’s battered skin, in his usual mockery of a lover’s caress, after he was satisfied of his pretense the man shifted and leaned back into the wall, settling Neil into position so that his abused hole was aligned with the warden’s cock.

Wright pushed inside him all at once, in one deep thrust and without any kind of stretching or preparation, and after all the beatings and abuse he had taken, Neil was too tired to contain his pained scream.

“No! Stop it! It hurts!” He was crying now, and every thrust of Wrights cock wrung a tortured noise from Neil’s mouth, when the redhead realized that Riko was sitting in front of him, three fingers coated in Neil’s blood, eyeing the point where Neil and Wright were joined, it finally dawned on the younger man what these two had meant by their meant event.

Riko’s dark eyes met his blue orbs, and the lord’s bloodied hand slowly glided towards Neil’s stretched entrance.

“I’ve always wanted to know how far a whore can stretch, I’ll get to find out today and I don’t even need to pay”

Neil forgot all about trying to keep his voice down for Andrew once the first of Riko’s blood-coated digits pushed inside his already filled and abused hole.

“S-stop! Fucking stop! I-I have never done-” Neil’s words were cut off as Wright pace increased to a brutality that had the shorter men screaming incoherently, wreathing in pain and trying to lift himself from the warden’s engorged member, which seemed to be tearing him apart from the inside.

“I’m sure you’ve never taken more than one cock at a time. Minyard doesn’t seem the sharing type. And yet I doubt you’ll struggle, you’ve enjoyed everything so far”

Riko’s finger withdrew after a few lazy thrusts, but then came a second finger, and eventually a third. Neil struggled and clawed at them both, unable to realize that the more he fought the deeper Wright’s cock plunged into him.

Lord Moriyama retrieved his fingers and brought them to eye level to inspect. He smiled and leaned into Neil, his nails digging into the boy’s hips.

“Beg and I might stop” Neil could feel Riko’s dick nudging at his entrance, trying to push its way into his stretched entrance even though it was already strained and abused with Wright still inside him. Neil was horrified, feeling that he might break beyond repair or even die if he had to take these two disgusting men at the same time. So, he begged and, in his despair, hoped that Riko might actually be telling the truth.

“I beg you, don’t do this to me. Don’t do this to me”

“You didn’t say please” Riko chided, putting the slightest bit of pressure into Neil’s entrance, the tip of his cock barely starting to breach the redhead’s stretched walls.

“Please! Riko, please stop!”

“Call me your King Neil. Beg your King to stop”

“K-King, please stop King!”

Riko seemed to consider for a moment, then laughed in his face “Hmm. Not good enough”

The lord’s cock pushed all the way into Neil’s full hole and for a moment, Neil stopped breathing due to the immense agony of both men’s erections splitting him open. Air whooshed out of him as Wright took his weight completely, Neil tried to close his eyes to distance himself from the experience, but of course, Riko wouldn’t allow it.

Lord Moriyama grabbed at his hips with a bruising grip, fucking into him with brutal strength, both him and Wright moving together back and forth, cocks rubbing together inside him, lust and hatred fueling every single thrust, the sensations nearly driving Neil mad with guilt and rage and _pleasure._ The last sensation was painful and humiliating to admit.

Riko’s hands where pushing at a tender spot on his right hip, where it joined the leg. The spot had given him trouble after he had nearly broken a leg when a horse trampled him while running from his father, and then Riko had also hit the spot with both mallet and whip earlier.

Lord Moriyama used all his strength to pull Neil’s legs farther apart and as both men fucked into him relentlessly, Riko pushed and _pushed_ until the redhead heard a tiny _snap_ that was nearly drowned over his agonized screams, the men’s grunts and moans, the slapping of skin against skin and the revolting, wet noises of their different bodily fluids.

It took a moment for Neil’s addled brain and beaten body to register the pain, but when it did, the man gave an animalistic howl. He kept screaming and weeping. They were literally breaking him apart. Were they going to fuck him until he died? Was that what they wanted?

Then he thought of Andrew. Andrew, with his quiet rage and his protectiveness and his deals. But his blonde monster wasn’t here to help him.

_Andrew. Andrew. Save me! I don’t want to die! ANDREW!_

He felt a white-hot stab of pain as Riko gave another deep, sharp thrust while he bit into his mouth, Wright’s more tender mouth was bruising love bites into his neck. It was too much, too much. The pain and overwhelming sensations that made Neil wish to just _die_ and be done with it. Neil fell apart and came, spilling over Riko’s skin, sickened and enraged at himself.

When _they_ came he wasn’t sure, by the time his vision cleared enough and the world came back into focus, they had already pulled out of him and he was lying back in the cot. He looked down at himself and was horrified to realize that there was not a single spot in his lower half that wasn’t painted by his blood or their come, the pain from his hip came from a strange bump protruding from his joint, seeming as if it would break the skin at any moment.

“It’s very rude to call another person’s name in bed Neil. It makes it look as if you didn’t enjoy our efforts” Wright sounded genuinely hurt, sitting at the edge of the cot, looking at the lord he so faithfully served.

Riko had stood up briefly to retrieve something from the bag where he kept his “toys”. It was a short dagger with a serrated triangular pommel, with two crisscrossing sections of thin, slightly barbed chain, braided along the handle. Clearly, the dagger was not meant to be used without hand protection, since Lord Moriyama had needed to put his gloves back on in order to wield it, but the small weapon was intended to maximize damage.

“I don’t appreciate your annoying bleating either. No matter how loud you scream, Minyard can’t come for you. And after all you’ve done, I don’t think he will ever want to”

Neil attempted a rude gesture, but his body didn’t seem willing to cooperate anymore and his throat felt like it was on fire, so he did not bother to try and speak.

Riko chuckled “Such a spit fire, how refreshing. It’s amusing that someone so small has such a temper”

Neil glared and spat in Riko’s general direction “It’s pitiful that such a proud lord has such a small dick. You even need another man’s help to finish”

Riko’s face was well worth the burning in Neil’s throat, but the redhead was obviously going to regret his final act of defiance rather soon.

“Hold him down” Riko roared a Wright and the warden jumped to oblige, settling himself behind Neil and using his full strength to straddle his upper body.

Riko waved the dagger in front of Neil and lowered to the redhead’s waist “Why don’t we test how good you are at taking some other things besides cock up that tight ass of yours Neil?”

Neil’s eyes widened in horror and he struggled “No! Don’t! Please, please! Riko, My King! Please don’t do this to me!”

“I won’t. I will fuck as many of my toys as I want into your hole, until there’s nothing left of you for Minyard to come back to”

Riko plunged the dagger hilt first into his ass and Neil let out a blood-curling scream that would give nightmares to anyone near enough to listen for a long time.

But Riko wasn’t done. Not even close.

Not for the first time that day, and surely not for the last either. Neil begged whoever would listen to just let him die.

He didn’t die, of course he didn’t. Neil clearly didn’t deserve such mercy after all the things he had ever done.

He never known he could scream so loudly. 

Neil hoped that Riko and Wright had lied and that Andrew really wasn’t close enough to listen.

 

But he was…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think, I'm not sure if I'm doing a good job with this or if maybe I've fallen short with it *sigh* also feel free to scream at me about this story or send me prompts to headbanging-nightrunner.tumblr.com ( I write for AFTG, Shadowhunter's Malec, Captive Prince and some anime)


	3. Cruel realizations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew hears screaming from his cell and dismisses it with indifference, until he recognizes who the voice belongs to.

Until very recently, Andrew had never particularly cared about dying. For most of his life he had been alone, and when someone had ‘looked after him’ it had left him wishing that he could go back to just being by himself. The eventual arrival of blood relatives into his life had not changed things, it had meant two more people to look after, but he didn’t believe for even a moment that _they_ could ever look after _him_.

Thus, he had learned not to care, or at least, to never allow anyone to know when he _did_ care. Caring made you weak, just like hope did, he had learned that lesson the hard way.

And then _he_ came into his life. Neil fucking Josten had waltzed into his life with his scars and his pale eyes and death chasing after him, Neil had showed up and altered everything, he made Andrew see how Nicky and Aaron tried, he had cared for the blonde monster and made Andrew care in return. Andrew hated him and all the new emotions he had started to feel since they met.

It was these emotions that had landed him on his current predicament. A couple of years ago, he wouldn’t have engaged Riko -he refused to think of him as a lord-  directly after the girl had been saved, he would have just walked away, but he let himself be provoked and had ended up in a cell with a death penalty looming over his head.

Andrew was attempting not to care about his impending death and failing. Miserably. He knew that his stupid family would try and help him, and he dreaded the kind of trouble they could undoubtedly get into in their attempts, especially one redheaded idiot.

He pushed that thought aside, he couldn’t worry about Neil’s lack of a sense of danger and self-preservation, if he did, he would just get more frustrated that he already was. He turned around in his cot for the umpteenth time, laying on his left side with his back to the wall, he stared at the bars of his cell for a lack of anything better to do.

A prison guard walked past his cell while doing his rounds and glanced sideways at Andrew with evident disdain.

“Why don’t you draw a portrait asshole, it will last longer” Andrew held the man’s gaze with an expressionless face until the guard snorted and looked away.

“Don’t flatter yourself imp, I’m just trying to consign to memory what a dying rat looks like. It comforts me to know that after tomorrow, there will be one less dirty sodomite walking the earth”

“Shame that I can’t say the same about one less incompetent git, but we aren’t all so lucky”

The guard sent Andrew one last venomous look before walking away “I hope that rope doesn’t kill you immediately, parasites like you deserve to suffer”

The hallway was empty again and the blonde man was left alone with his thoughts for a long time, he tried to distract himself by citing quotes from the last book he had read to himself, but that made him think of Neil, since it had been him who gave Andrew the book and that only brought back his initial frustration, so he had to stop himself from any further endeavors to entertain himself. This was going to be a really long night.

Andrew was trying to fall asleep the first time he heard it.

Someone started to scream nearby.

It was inconsistent at first, just a random pained shout every once in a while that Andrew attempted to ignore in favor of a few hours of rest, but the screams started to become more and more frequent and the blonde had to put aside any notion of sleep, he stood up from his cot and walked towards the bars of his cell, he pressed his head against the bars and turned his head sideways, trying to see if there was anyone down the hall that could tell him what the hell was happening.

Unsurprisingly, there was no one to be found. Andrew was sure that the next guard should pass his cell in a few minutes, but the increasing volume and frequency of the screaming was getting on his nerves and he wanted to know _why_ whatever was happening to that poor bastard was happening so close to him.

He knew it was callous of him to hear a man’s cries of pain and think of nothing but how annoying and inconvenient the noise was for him, but he couldn’t really bring himself to care when his nerves were frayed by his anger, worry and; even though it was hard to admit it, by fear as well.

Andrew would think back to this brief moment of insensitive apathy later on and his stomach would churn with anger, because these were no stranger’s screams.

There were a few more minutes of blissful ignorance before the disjointed screams turned into actual sentences.

_“No. Stop it! It hurts!”_

_“Don’t do this to me!”_

_“Please! Riko, please stop!”_

It took a moment, but then it downed on Andrew. He knew this voice. He knew all too well.

It was Neil. The person producing those tortured screams was Neil.

Andrew felt cold dread travel down his spine and settle into his stomach. Why was Neil here? What had he done? What was being done to _him,_ to make him scream like that?

Andrew pushed his face into the bars, as far as it would go and he called for a guard at the top of his lungs. He needed to know what that fucking idiot had gotten himself into.

But what could he do, even if he found out what was happening?

Andrew didn’t hear any approaching footsteps, but he was finding hard to believe that there wasn’t a single person close enough to hear him. For hours now, the guards had made a sport of mocking and taunting him as they passed, trying to get a reaction out of him, and now they couldn’t be bothered to check on him when he was making such a fuss?

He didn’t buy it. This whole thing was intentional.

He turned to look around in his chamber for something that would help him call his jailers’ attention. His tiny living space was austere, but he managed to wrench a thin, blunt piece of metal free from his cot, he smashed it against the bars of his cell, producing a shrill metallic sound that drilled at his eardrums.

Clearly, it also bothered the prison workers, because they came out from wherever they had been pretending not to hear him to yank the metal piece away. The guards face was spotted red and his features seemed livid.

“Stop that god-awful noise! What in the bloody hell is wrong with you? you crazy bastard?”

Andrew dismissed the man’s admonition, there were things far more important for him right now.

“That’s what I want to know” The blonde said between clenched teeth “What the hell happened? Why is Neil Josten screaming? What did he do?”

“Who?” The guard seemed genuinely baffled at the name, so Andrew had to try again.

“Neil Josten!” Andrew spat out “He’s part of my family and he knew about my sentence! And now he’s here, I demand to know why! What are they doing to him?!”

The guard shrugged “I don’t know who you’re talking about, and none of us were informed of anything, we’re just security here you know”

Andrew’s anger rose, his arms flew between the bars of his jail cell and reached for the guard, the blonde pulled the older man against his cell with all the strength he possessed- which was considerable for someone his size- and smacked him once, twice and then a third time against the iron bars, the guard grunted and tried to break himself free of Andrew’s hold, but to no avail, he was stunned by the heavy blows and the surprising force the short blonde possessed. This brief hesitation was all the short monster needed, and in the next moment, the guard was struggling for his every breath and fighting fiercely to stop the Minyard bastard’s attempts to throttle any information out of him.

There was another piercing shriek from Neil and the surge of impotent rage had Andrew squeezing harder around the man’s neck.

“Do you hear that? _That_ is an innocent man being tortured for no evident reason! What did he do? Why is he here when my conviction has already been passed? TELL ME!”

The guardian finally managed to get some purchase and pull himself away from Andrew, after he released himself from the blonde’s hold, the other man swiftly slid one of his legs between the bars of the cell and kicked the short monster square in the chest, caught by surprise, Andrew stumbled to the floor, he hissed in pain and glared at the guard, but when he attempted to get up he was brought down once more by a direct hit to the face from the blunt end of the officer’s sword scabbard. Andrew lay on the floor a hand to his tender stomach, he knew from previous experience that nothing was broken, he had only been left breathless, his left eye throbbed in hot pain though, and he could almost feel that whole side of his side bruising, it was an annoying but easily ignored pain however, he had been through worse before.

By the time Andrew got his bearings and stood up, the patrol officer had moved well away from his reach. The man was rubbing at his neck and he was glaring daggers at his prisoner.

“I don’t know why that kid’s here” the guardian snarled “but if he’s anything like you, he deserves all that’s coming is way!”

The officer spat in Andrew’s general direction and walked away, leaving the blonde to brood and worry in impotent rage. He paced around his cell, with Neil’s unintelligible screams constantly piercing his skull, hammering at his brain, bringing with them more and more of these horrible _feelings_ that he had never wanted to torment him.

Wave after wave of dread washed over him each time Neil made a sound, he struck the bars of his cell once more, making them cry in high-pitched agony under his ministration, but no one else turned up this time around, no matter how much he taunted or screamed.

After a while he collapsed onto his cot, panting heavily and sweating profusely, he leaned against the wall and listened, against his better judgment, he hoped that whatever was happening to Neil had been in consequence of his mouthy nature instead of anything more serious and that his punishment would be over soon enough. Physical pain was a annoying, but they both had very high thresholds of pain, and Aaron would patch him up out of brotherly loyalty for his twin in nothing else.

Andrew really should have known better, he had grown up around monster, for many years he had been raised by monsters and had been molded into who he was by them.

One should never hope around monsters.

_Andrew. Andrew. Save me! I don’t want to die! ANDREW!_

He felt something inside his chest shatter, the jagged edges tearing a bloody path down his throat, settling on his stomach. Neil was in such agony that he was calling out to _him_ he was begging for his help.

And Andrew was caged in his fucking cell, unable to do anything to help one of the only people that gave a shit about him. He was so close to his idiot, but he might as well be miles away for all the good it did them.

_No! Don’t! Please, please! Riko, My King! Please don’t do this!_

Andrew threw himself against the bars with renewed vigor. He screamed for help, he called for an officer or a physician for _anyone_ to just come and tell him what was happening but no one came.

Please. _Please._ There was that detested word again. Andrew had hate that word for so many years now, because it was useless, no one in his life had ever cared about him saying please. He was made to say it as a taunt, to mock him for being naïve and desperate. No good ever came out of saying please, so he had stopped saying it and had prompted his family to never utter that word near him.

And now Neil was screaming it, begging for mercy at the top of his lungs, yet his torment didn’t seem to diminish and he was given yet another reason to loathe that particular expression.

Neil let out a blood-curling scream in the distance and Andrew’s panic increased. Why was nobody coming? Why didn’t anyone care about the fact that he had almost choked a guard or dented the cell bars?

Andrew tried everything he could think of to call back a guard, and when nothing seemed to work, he sat on the floor and waited. Though the notion of having to wait until it was time to walk to the gallows for any type of clue about his idiot’s fate was grating. Nothing could be worse than this uncertainty.

But he was soon proved wrong when Neil gave one last broken wail and then stopped screaming altogether. He knew that wasn’t good. His idiot was a fighter he had been on the run for years before they met, had almost died many times when The Butcher had been after him. Neil knew torture and no matter what they did to him, he had never stopped fighting.

But now he wasn’t screaming anymore, and Andrew couldn’t know if it was because his torture was over or if he had lost consciousness.

He would not let himself think about the other alternative. His idiot could not be dead. He was _not_ dead. Neil was a lot more tough than that, he hadn’t broken under his own father’s hands. If the Butcher had not been able to shatter his mouthy son, some pathetic prison workers in tiny no-good Palmetto wouldn’t be able to destroy him either.

Of course, back then, Andrew had no way of knowing just what kind of sick bastards held Neil’s life in their hands.

After what felt like an eternity, Andre heard footsteps approaching down his corridor, an elongated shadow turned the corner and then there was a tall figure standing at the other side of his cell, holding a torch on his left hand. The man must have been at least 6’2” and he was standing ramrod straight, looking at Andrew impassively with his cool grey eyes. He had short black hair and the number three tattooed in roman numerals on his left cheek, he was dressed in plain but high-quality clothes of red and black, his simple crimson tunic had the coat of arms of a black raven in flight emblazoned on his left breast. Andrew could recognize that sigil anywhere. This was a Moriyama man, and from the brand of his cheek one of those close enough to Lord Riko to be branded as property.

Andrew’s nerves were frayed beyond any notion of civility, and the presence of this Moriyama man near him put him too on edge for any pretense of courtesy.

“What the hell is a Moriyama servant doing here? Didn’t you see all the ouchies I gave to your master? Go flying back to him and leave me alone, unless you want some matching bruises as well”.

The man chuckled loudly “I’d been informed of your lack of education and manners, but it seems to me that that may have been an understatement. _Tu n'es qu'une sous-merde.”_

Andrew didn’t need to understand French to know that he was being mocked. Again. And right now, he didn’t have the best of dispositions for it.

“Say what you want you filthy snail-snapper, why the fuck are you here”

“So rude” the Frenchman stepped closer and took his right hand to his utility belt, from it he procured a ring of keys and held it up to eye level.

“I’ve been tasked with delivering the news of your new-found freedom _connard,_ you will not hang tomorrow”

The blonde was unimpressed by these news, since they were not what he cared about right now, but he took the bait and asked anyway.

“Why?”

The Frenchman looked away “Your… _friend,_ the small one” he said, obviously hesitating at the proper term to use for Neil “He pleaded to warden Josiah Wright to put in a word for leniency in your sentence”

Andrew scoffed derisively “And I suppose _Riko_ just agreed out of the kindness of his heart?” Yeah right, it was that uppity bastard’s ego that had landed him here in the first place.

“ _Lord_ Moriyama” The Frenchman said, placing special emphasis on the title “And of course he would not let a _crétin_ like you walk away just like that. But he was persuaded to spare your life in exchange of a very…particular payment as well as an alternate form of punishment for _you_.”

Andrew didn’t know what this payment entailed or what his new punishment would be, but he didn’t think for a second that whatever had been done to Neil was the end of it

 “Let me guess, you were assigned to come and escort me to whatever this new punishment is?”

“Not exactly”

Andrew gritted his teeth “What in the fuck do you want then baguette boy?”

“My name’s Jean, if you must know”

Andrew pointed at himself “This is me caring. Just tell me where the hell are we going”

“Are you not worried about your _petit copain?_ Even I could hear him, and I was a lot farther away from him that you currently are.”

The blonde man felt a faint stab of dread at the words, was the Moriyama dog seriously offering to take him to Neil? Did _he_ know what had been done to his blue-eyed idiot?

He didn’t ask either of these questions however, opting instead to inquire something that would reveal less of his current state of mind.

“What do you care frog? Are you going to tell me why he was brought here?”

Jean inserted one of his keys into the keyhole and turned it this way and that several times, there was a faint clicking sound and the door sprang open, squeaking audibly as it swung on its hinges.

“I’m going to take you to him” Jean announced and motioned for the short blonde to step outside.

“I haven’t got all night Minyard, we must go, he will need your help after what he’s been through”

“Which was?”

The Frenchman turned back towards the aisle where he had first come from, seemingly avoiding Andrew’s gaze. Now that he stood closer to the taller man and that he could better see his face illuminated by the torch, he looked pale and sweaty, even slightly green. The monster wondered what that was about.

“I am not at liberty to tell you. I was just ordered to let you know that Neil Josten had already payed for your life and to guide you so that you can remove him from the premises, since his presence is no longer required”

Andrew stepped into the hall and followed frenchie into a long corridor, it was cold and humid, with the only illumination coming from the torched hanging on the stone walls, both men walked in silence, though the smaller of them turned around frequently to take in his surroundings. He noticed that after they had turned a corner, random wooden doors appeared on the walls, they were few and far between, but the heavy oak they were made of as well as the small area dedicated to peepholes and food slots allowed Andrew to guess that he had just walked into the isolation corner.

Jean stopped suddenly and Andrew was so immersed in his own thoughts that he almost crashed into the other man’s back before he gathered himself.

“Are French people so dim that they don’t know how to give fair warning before any sudden action or lack thereof, you soggy croissant?”

“I will not follow you farther than this _salaud_ ” Jean announced “Lord Moriyama said that what’s in that cell is for your eyes only. Take him and get out of here, it will be for the best if you do as you’re told for once in your life. Keep walking down the hall, it’s the second door on the left.”

Andrew lingered for a moment to watch the figure of Jean retreat into the shadows before he turned back towards the direction he had been pointed to.

Andrew was afraid to admit even to himself the trepidation he felt, walking down that aisle. If Riko had instructed that only he could look at Neil after whatever torture he had been made to endure, it must mean that _Lord_ Moriyama was expecting to shock him with what had been done to Neil, but as his idiot so loved to say, he would be _fine_ if it was only physical pain Aaron would patch him up and Andrew would make sure he took proper care of himself, and eventually his redhead would be ok.

He passed the first door without realizing and very nearly walked past the second one before he realized his mistake and rightened his course, he paused in front of the door and noticed that both the eyehole and the food slot were open, that must have been what allowed the sound to carry towards his cell, since they hadn’t been so far away.

Andrew took a deep breath and centered himself before reaching a hand towards the door handle. Whatever had happened to his idiot, he would make sure he was all right and then he would throttle him for being a dimwitted imbecile.

But even Andrew’s rough childhood, and his life of constant blood and violence could never have prepared him for the sight that awaited him at the other side of that door.

The door creaked open and Andrew walked in, once his gaze zeroed in on the collapsed figure laying on the cot he gasped and then took a sharp intake of breath to center himself.

His first thought was that he had been too late and Neil was actually dead.

But corpses didn’t breathe and Neil _was_ breathing. Minute, shallow and labored gasps, but Andrew would take those over the possibility of his idiot being dead.

Once Andrew had walked close enough to check Neil over, he noticed all the blood. He wondered how it had been possible for him not to notice as soon as he walked into the room, but the fear of Neil being dead had blinded him to everything else. But he wasn’t blind now.

Neil’s cot was soaked with blood, to the point that its original color couldn’t be made out, the same had happened to the thin sheet that covered the redhead, it was stained so far with dark crimson that it almost looked black. Neil’s usually pale skin was painted in varying shades of black, blue, purple and red and Andrew couldn’t discern a single fragment of intact ivory flesh. And his face, _oh god_ , his face. Andrew felt stricken and his heart shrank by just looking at his lover.

Both Neil’s eyes were a dark purple and swollen to the point that only a tiny slit of chilly blue could be made out behind his eyelids, his nose was crooked, bruised and plastered with congealed blood, and his lips were torn and bloody.

Andrew was startled to realize that Neil was conscious, barely, his pale eyes were barely open and looked at him with glazed eyes.

“ ‘Drew?”  he choked out; seeming confused at the other’s presence and his faint, quivering voice ignited something fierce and scorching within Andrew’s entrails, which was only fueled farther when the blonde noticed the loose piece of rope still tangled around the other man’s neck.

“Don’t talk” The blonde chastised, moving to remove the loose rope from Neil’s neck to let him breath a bit better. The redhead was struggling to breath with his airways congested with blood and phlegm and the sobs that had caught in his throat.

“ ‘m s-sorry” Neil croaked, his voice breaking and failing to the point that Andrew could barely understand what he had said. The redhead reached out for his lover with a trembling right hand but stopped right before he could caress Andrew’s face. The blonde sucked in a breath when he saw all the cuts, the blood and the last three fingers o his hand because fingers did not naturally bend like that.

“‘m so s-sorry” Neil insisted weakly “h-had to t-try” he wheezed painfully “try to s-save you-” his lover’s words broke off as his hand went limp and fell to the cot at the same time that his eyes rolled back into their sockets, succumbing to unconsciousness.

Andrew remembered, from what little attention he paid to Aaron when he went into one of his medical tirades, that the human body held about 8 pints of blood and that losing any more than 3 of these became potentially life threatening, looking at the cot, sheets and the crimson puddle he was kneeling over on the floor, Neil really couldn’t afford to bleed any more than this.

Aaron, he needed Aaron _now_.

First, he needed to wrap Neil up, keep him warm so that Andrew could take him to Aaron. He hovered for a moment unsure about where he should put his hands. Neil was laying face down, with half of his face obscured by the blood-soaked matted mass that his hair had become, the blonde could see the mangled, dark-red mess that his back was. Andrew moved him to lay on his side and then removed the thin sheet that covered his idiots body.

He was not ready to see the mangled mess that lay underneath.

There was a Japanese kodachi embedded hilt first into Neil’s ass, it had been shoved in so deeply that only a glimpse of the oval sword guard could be seen and the blade constantly cut into the flayed skin of his redhead’s thighs at the slightest hint of movement, causing a constant stream of crimson blood mixed with other fluids to cascade down Neil’s legs, pooling into the already soaked mattress. One of his legs was bent and at a strange angle and appeared shorter that the other, two toes had been smashed with such force that they rested in the opposite direction that the rest of the toes on Neil’s right foot. There was a huge lump on his idiot’s right hip were the bone seemed dangerously close to breaking the skin and that was when it downed on him. Neil had been raped so savagely that he had had _blades_ thrust inside him and his right hip had been dislocated.

Andrew felt so nauseous that he had to look away. He had not tried to fool himself about the nature of Neil’s torture after laying eyes on him. He had seen the come in his mouth, hands and chest, but never in his worst nightmares could he have imagined _this_. A lifetime of abuse, of being held down and raped over and over, to the point where he thought nothing would ever be able to faze him anymore and he never _once_ had thought anyone capable of this kind of violence.

The sickness and nausea clawed at Andrew’s throat and he bent into the stone floor as he retched and gagged; he hadn’t eaten since hours before his arrest, but that didn’t stop the blazing heat that burned his throat as he tried to force the bile back down and failed. He poured what little his stomach held into the cobblestoned of the cell. His stomach kept on contracting violently until there was nothing left for him to bring up. He dry heaved a few more times before he could get himself under control. His face was pale, thin trail of bile running down his chin before he wiped it away with his hand, he was sweating and trembling. The pungent stench of his own sick pierced through his shock, he turned back towards Neil, shaky and numb. Neil needed help, he had to get him to Aaron, whatever this thing brewing inside him was, he could feel it later, not now. Not _now_.

Andrew felt oddly detached and deadened as he knelt close to Neil again. He understood vaguely that it might not be good to remove the sword from inside the redhead, but he also knew that all the jostling as they moved could make Neil’s injuries worse if the blade remained, so there was no good choice for him to make in this situation, only a practical one.

Later, the blonde would be unable to recall skinning his palms open when he grabbed the sharp blade bare-handed and pulled it out of Neil. Yet more blood and come poured out once the sword was removed, but Andrew had no time to focus on it. He needed to get moving.

He flung the katana as far away as he could in the tiny room and heard it crash into an unknown object and shatter it. He glanced around briefly and saw that it had been a glass bottle, he recognized the smell that wafted into his nostrils from some of his worst memories.

_Neil had been drugged._

_Not now_. He told himself again. _It can wait. Neil needs help._

Andrew tried to look around for something to cover Neil with, but his clothes were nowhere to be found. Unable to afford any more time, Andrew took off his own thick coat- which he had mercifully been allowed to keep- and lifted his unconscious lover from the cot to maneuver him into it.

And he was delivered yet another crushing blow.

There had been a reason to half of Neil’s face being concealed with his grimy hair. Riko had _carved_ a number four on his left cheekbone, emulating the tattoos that branded _Lord_ Moriyama and those of his inner circle. The wound was small, but it was still fresh and oozed blood, making it seem as though Neil’s left eye was crying blood; there was also a thick, rusty nail that had been inserted into the redhead’s earlobe, fastening a piece of parchment with something scribbled into it. Andrew understood that it was meant to be reminiscent of the tags used on cattle…or slaves. The short man felt the impulse to yank the nail free along with the fucking tag, but then he realized what he would be doing to Neil and dislodged it gently, he held the parchment close to his face to see what it contained.

Andrew had been wrong. It wasn’t a tag, but rather a note in elegant but cramped handwriting.

 _Minyard, I’ve left you a present to remember us by once he’s gone. I always get my pleasure and this one is on_ you _._

He felt a prickle of rage stab at the fog of numbness around his mind, and he forced himself to beat it back. He crumpled the note and threw it aside.

 _Not. NOW!_ Riko would die a slow, painful dead. But it had to be for later.

He finally managed to shove Neil as gently as he could into his coat, he was too cold and his breathing was labored and shallow, so Andrew chose the least bloody of the sheets and covered him with it for good measure. The blond took his lover into his arms and ran out of the room, for once thanking his perfect recall for not having to fumble his way into finding the entrance.

Earlier, he had thought it odd that no guards had gone to check on him after the ruckus he had raised, but now he understood that they had all been gathered either around Neil’s cell or close to the entrance. They all were leering at his unconscious lover and then switched their gazes toward him.

“Your little friend puts on such a good show” one of the guards said, licking his lips.

Another leaned closer to them, and Andrew clutched Neil tighter to his chest “You could both make some real cash if you don’t mind exhibitionism. Red there seems like quite the treat.”

“So much energy for such a little guy. You’re letting him go to waste, seems like he can handle some roughhousing” Andrew never knew which guard said the last part, he shoved the one closest to him aside wit as much strength as he could muster, mindful not to jostle Neil too much. He ran off, not caring what the guards’ remarks might imply about his lover’s torment, right now his boyfriend needed the best medical attention that could be provided.

He reached their home faster that should have been possible and kicked the door aside and was frustrated to realize that, for once, Aaron wasn’t here, tending to his patients until the wee hours of the night. He debated what to do, he knew he couldn’t risk carrying Neil around the whole city with the terrible wounds he bore, but he feared so much as looking away from him and then risk turning back to find him dead, but what choice did he have?

He laid Neil on their bed carefully and leaned in close to his ear “Dying breaks all of our promises, and I would never forgive you for that you moronic martyr” he took one more glance at his blue-eyed fool and ran off to find his brother.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...here's Andrew's POV of the whole thing, please let me know your thoughts! Also, I won't be posting for 2-3 weeks, since this junior high teacher is going into spring break and then I'm being sent to an educational symposium thing and my internet acces will range from spotty to non-existent. See you all around mid-April!


	4. Help is on the way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaand I'm back. Sorry for the delay, this chapter should have been up a few days ago, but my high schoolers are in the middle of evaluation week so...yeah. The life of a teacher what can I say? But please enjoy this little belated angst fest.
> 
> Andrew finally finds Aaron and pleads with him to heal Neil.
> 
> Mind the tags guys! As always lots of thanks to wingsofwax and myunlikelyhero for enabling and supporting my crazy.

Andrew ran out of the house in a trance. Later he would think back to this moment and realize that he couldn’t remember what was going through his mind after leaving Neil on their bed, and his earnest plea for the redhead to fight for his life.

The blonde told himself that Neil had been through hell before and survived, he tried to convince himself that the idiotic martyr would pull through again, like he always did, but the deeper, lesser and most skeptic part of Andrew constantly whispered into his head how he himself had wished to die so many times after Drake, and none of his abuse could ever come close to _this_.

The blonde silenced these dark thoughts as he fumbled through the streets of Palmetto, he had no clear idea where to start looking for his brother, his family and friends were creatures of routine, and there were only a handful of places they frequented, Andrew just needed a bit of luck. Apparently even that small mercy was too much to ask.

Aaron was not at Eden’s twilight, their chosen pub for hanging out thanks to the modest prices, Abby Winfield also hadn’t seen him that day, since she said that he only payed her a visit if he had a particularly tough case with a patient. Andrew was running out of both patience and places to look and cursed himself as a fool when he realized that he hadn’t remembered to check Boyd’s place earlier.

He raced through the empty streets and alleys until he reached Matt’s small house, he saw the faint flickers of light through the windows and felt that small flutter of treacherous hope swell within his chest. Andrew mercilessly hammered at the door with his fists until he heard the murmur of footsteps approaching the other side of the threshold.

Matt’s voice rumbled with a mixture of confusion and anger “Who is it?”

“Open the door Boyd, I need to find Aaron”

The door swung open in a flash, and the tall, muscular frame of Matthew Boyd stared down at him in utter disbelief.

“Andrew? But I thought- How are you here?” The taller man seemed unable to process the picture before him and Andrew could hardly blame him, but he really had to time for explanations.

“Not now” Andrew replied sharply “Is Aaron here?”

“Yes, he got here a couple hours ago” Matt replied, and then stepped in front of Andrew when the short blond started to make his way toward Boyd’s bedroom “He’s asleep. He ran himself ragged with patients and then drank himself to sleep once he got here, since you know, he thought his brother was dying and all. I don’t think you should wake him up”

Andrew stared up at the other man impassively before he stepped around him and towards his brother.

“Good think I’m not asking for your advice”

Matt made to grab at his arm but stopped in his tracks once he took a closer look at Andrew. His skin was pale and had the faintest tinge of gray, he sported many bruises and cuts; his hands were sliced open and oozing constant droplets of crimson onto the floor, his clothes were soaked in blood and he seemed to be having some trouble catching his breath. Worst of all were his eyes, His pupils were blown to the point were only a small ring of hazel could be seen and the whites around his irises were faintly bloodshot, Matt couldn’t pinpoint the exact emotion underlaying the blonde’s nearly blank face, but he knew that it wasn’t the monster’s usual indifference and the notion unsettled him.

“Matt, I really need to see my brother”

 _That_ is when it finally sinks in with Matt that there must be something really serious going on. Andrew had not addressed him by name before, and he seldom referred to Aaron as his brother when he could simply use his name, much less admitted to needing him for anything. There must have been something serious going on to put Andrew in this state. He nodded and guided the blonde into the room he shared with Aaron whenever he stayed over and opened the door, motioning for Andrew to step inside. Matt walked to the bed and knelt beside Aaron, who was dead to the world, after a few gentle shakes failed to rouse his lover, Matt put a little more force behind his efforts and leaned close to murmur something into Aaron’s ear, which finally seemed to wake him up.

“Sorry dear, but you need to get up. Andrew needs you”

Aaron rubbed his eyes and stared confusedly at Matt, murmuring sleepily “What happened? Is it time? Did something happen”

Andrew decided it was time to step in and move things along, Neil didn’t have time to waste “I’m here. You have to come with me”

Aaron looked from Andrew to Matt and back again, seemingly unable to believe his eyes.

“How did…? What?”

“I know, and I _will_ explain. But later, right now I need your help”

Aaron pulled the blankets off from his body and stood up, clearly agitated “Andrew what the hell-”

“It’s Neil” Andrew stated simply, then because he needed his brother to understand how dire the situation was he added a quiet, hesitant “ _please_ ”

Aaron’s and Matt’s eyes widened at the plea, Aaron tried to say something but words failed him. Whatever had happened had to be serious to get Andrew to ask for anything using the phrase he most hated.

“What happened to Neil?” Matt asked, seeming to have finally processed Andrew’s words.

Andrew hesitated, seemingly unable to phrase his thoughts properly “I can’t…It’s … It’ll be easier to just show you. Let’s go”

The shock was enough to get the other Minyard moving, he asked Matt to retrieve his bag and equipment while he changed, then tried to pry more information from Andrew to no avail. The twins walked back into the living, Aaron struggling to button his coat, while Matt walked back into the room with Aaron’s satchel of medical supplies, the younger Minyard made a motion to grab it but Matt shock his head and walked to the door.

“I’m coming too” he stated simply and hesitantly walked back to Aaron “Neil is my friend and I want to help you anyway I can”

Aaron gave him a tiny smile of appreciation and nodded, then looked back to Andrew “let’s go”

The three of them ran out of the house and back towards Neil as fast as they could, Andrew leading the way, with the other two close behind. Once they reached the Minyard home Andrew unceremoniously threw the door open with far more strength than necessary, nearly taking it off its hinges, he led Aaron and Matt to the bedroom and both men cried out when their gazes landed on Neil.

“ _Oh god_ ” Matt exclaimed brokenly, his face contorted as if he would start crying any second.

“What the hell happened?” Aaron gasped, approaching Matt and nearly tearing the bag of medical supplies from his arms in haste, he rushed towards the bed and leaned down to examine Neil’s unconscious form. But the damage was so extensive, he was at a loss about where to start.

Andrew who had remained quiet so far answered between clenched teeth “The fool saved me, he put himself in _Lord_ Riko’s hands in exchange for my freedom”

Andrew stared at him intently, emotion finally breaking through his face and blazing in his eyes “Save him.”

Aaron nodded “I will do all I can, But Andrew he’s-”

“No” Andrew hissed “You will save him. He saved my life and now you will save _him_ ”

Aaron said nothing and turned back to Neil, the damage was so severe and extensive, he didn’t know where to begin. There was so much blood and his breathing was labored and shallow, Aaron feared Neil might be going into shock. Aaron fell into that numb, detached space in his mind where he could go heal his patients without being affected by the atrocities he sometimes had to see. He couldn’t let himself be affected, emotions could cloud his judgment, and that could easily cost him a patient’s life, Neil’s life. He might not care for the jerk, but he was a decent enough person and he made his brother happy. So, Neil would not die. Not on his watch.

The bastard was not making it easy to save his life though, with so many injuries and all that blood, Aaron couldn’t yet see which were the injuries that needed the most urgent treatment.

He started to frantically yell orders at both Matt and Andrew, who had seen him in action enough times by now to know what he needed of them. Together, they brought him hot water, rolls and rolls of bandages and alcohol, Matt moved back towards the bed and with tears in his eyes, he helped to remove the blood-soaked sheet that was his friend’s only protection. After Neil was naked, fully exposing the extent of the damage -which was massive, since Aaron had an easier time of identifying which parts of Neil’s body were not injured instead of the other way around- Andrew and matt used all the water they had to wash away as much of the blood as possible so that Aaron could take proper inventory of the redhead’s injuries.

“He has several fractures, but I’ll have to attend to those later. Right now, I need to locate all the injuries that need stitching and attend to those, to slow the bleeding, then I have to disinfect all of his open wounds.

It was a way to ground himself, to give himself some type of control over the situation, finding a sort of order within the chaos of this brutality. However, he had not expected his brother to bring himself out of his shocked daze to reply to his tirade.

“He had a sword in him when I found him”

“What? I don’t see a sword wound anywhere-” he was interrupted when his brother shook his head, his bleeding hands trembled slightly and he was clenching his teeth so hard, Aaron feared he might break them.

“No. Riko…He…He used it to…rape him” the blank look on Andrew’s pale, wide-eyed face made the meaning of those words sink in

He gave a sharp intake of breath. Behind him, he heard Matt gasp and drop the empty pail that he’d been holding, when Aaron turned to look at his lover, he realized that the taller man was about to reach his emotional breaking point. Even with the harshness he must see every day at work, Matt was an open, loving person, completely unused to this level of brutality. He also considered Neil one of his closest friends, nearly family. And Aaron was both immensely proud and utterly gutted at Matt’s resolve to help in this situation. He walked towards the taller man and put a hand on his shoulder, making his lover look up at him.

“Both of you have helped me with all you could for now. I’ll take it from here” he paused, leaning forward so that their foreheads were touching “Wait in the common room all right? Take Andrew with you and make sure he doesn’t do anything reckless, can you do that?”

Matt nodded “Anything for you. You know it. Do what you can”

Matt grabbed the empty pail and headed for the door of the bedroom, he looked back at Andrew, unsure of what to do and clearly scared of an outburst when the older Minyard was so clearly shaken. Andrew’s gaze was locked on Neil’s prone frame, a flash of intense emotion breaking through his face before he could control it. Then he looked back at his twin.

“Save him” he pleaded once more. Aaron could tell how much it cost his brother to speak through the turmoil of his mind, and how reluctant he was to leave the room, but he knew he had to, so that Aaron could focus completely on Neil.

“I will. Have Matt treat your hands for you. He knows how” Though he was speaking to Andrew, he looked past him at his lover to address the last part, once he saw him nod and they both walked out, he threw himself back into the work of treating Neil.

After Andrew’s revelation, Aaron’s first priority was to asses the damage to Neil’s lower body. He paled once he realized how extensive the tearing was and how deeply it extended. He understood now that these wounds along with the whip marks on Neil’s back were the main source of the bleeding. He sterilized a needle with alcohol and fire and set to work in stitching the gaping wounds in Neil’s rectum while counting it as a small mercy that he hadn’t prolapsed.

Aaron didn’t know how long he had been at it. Hours? Days? The gashes and tears didn’t seem to end, he was so focused on closing these wounds and slowing the bleeding, he never heard the door to the house open to let Nicky inside, he didn’t notice his cousin call out to him in bafflement.

“Aaron? What’s going on? How the hell is Andrew here? And why is he injured? And why’s Matt passed out on our-” the door to the bedroom burst open with all the strength of Nicky’s incessant energy, his eyes bulged open once he took in the scene -Neil’s unconscious body, his injuries and all the blood, as well as Aaron leaning over him with all the medical supplies he possessed laying around them- Nicky let out a small hysterical shriek and began to sob incessantly, he was arrested on the threshold and Aaron shouted at him before he could step inside.

“Get out Nicky! You can’t help him, I can’t afford to get distracted so please, go!”

Nicky hiccupped and kept on crying, sliding down to the floor but making no move to leave. Aaron turned back and kept cleaning and stitching, finally able to move on to the flayed skin of Neil’s thighs, when the sound of Nicky’s crying escalated in volume though, he screamed for reinforcements at the top of his lungs.

“Matt, Andrew!” he bellowed, and eventually heard two set of approaching footsteps. When his brother and lover materialized at the door they seemed taken aback by Nicky’s hysterical presence in the house. Andrew looked towards Neil and once he realized that he hadn’t been summoned for news related to the redhead, he turned and walked away”

“Take him to Erik’s, he shouldn’t be here!” Aaron gestured in Nicky’s direction and waited for Matt’s reply.

“Of course, I’ll take him. I’m sorry, I didn’t hear him get in. I feel asleep”

“That’s all right” Aaron reassured, not once looking away from Neil’s body, he was binding Neil’s legs in heavy layers of gauze before he could move on to treat the whip marks on his back.

“Come back quick please. I will need both of your help to set back his hipbone. It’s dislocated”

His lover paled at this but agreed quickly, he knelt next to Nicky and talked to him in a hushed voice until he was able to coax him away from the door. His cousin got up in a daze, leaning into Matt and allowing himself to be manhandled away from the room. Aaron heard them walk away and was grateful, not for the first time, for whatever he had done to deserve Matt.

Aaron maneuvered Neil onto his stomach in order to tend to his back. He winced at the mangled mess he saw there, but he quickly pulled himself together and set to work, cleaning wounds, applying ointments and medicines, stitching the deeper gashes and binding the more superficial ones. At some point, Matt returned and let him know that he was ready whenever he was needed. It took Aaron hours, but at last, he was able to bandage and stitch all of Neil’s more pressing injuries and now he could attend to his torn earlobe, the mild concussion and the innumerable bruises and cuts that littered his body. All that was left was to set his three broken fingers, two broken toes and his dislocated hip. The latter was the one that made Aaron most uneasy.

He would need to pop the bone back in place, and that required a great deal of strength that had to be exerted in very specific places, he would need Matt and Andrew’s help to manage it, and even then, he wasn’t sure how extensive the damage to the leg was. Neil would probably need weeks just to be able to stand up, and there was always the possibility of complications, and the very least, he could have a permanent limp because of it.

 He set the fingers of Neil’s right hand back in place and bound the entire hand for good measure, he did the same for his right toes and finished applying an additional layer of antiseptic and anesthetic ointment to the massive bruises on Neil’s face and arms. He also wrapped Neil’s ribs tightly, because even though there were no breaks of fissures that Aaron could find, they must have been bruised given the trouble Neil had breathing. He left the younger man lying on his side, mindful of his torn back, while he set out to report his progress to Matt and Andrew and request their help for the last part of the procedure.

He walked out, leaving the door open in order to be able to listen in case Neil woke up, which Aaron doubted due to the extent of his injuries. Once he arrived in the common room, he was surprised to find both Matt and Andrew completely passed out, each in one of the tattered armchairs available in the room. He took a moment to stare at his brother who, by all accounts should have been on his way to death, but had managed to walk out of prison, presumably because of whatever Neil had done to leave him nearly death and completely brutalized. Andrew had a few small bruises littering his face and both of his hands were tightly bandaged, small spots of crimson painting the white gauze, he jumped up and lashed out with an arm at the sound of his approach but managed to rein himself in once he realized who was in the room with him.

A question shone clear behind his brother’s tired gaze and he managed to answer before Andrew got unnecessarily worked up.

“He’s doing fine so far. Managed to stop the bleeding and stitch all the major wounds, including the tearing to his…. rectum, which was massive” Andrew’s eyes narrowed slightly at this, but Aaron pressed on “I cleaned and bound all the gashes and wounds as well as I could, but I’ll still need to be on the watch for an infection. I also set his minor fractures, but I’m going to need help with his dislocated hip.

Andrew seemed to understand his meaning immediately and he stood from his place in the armchair. His posture made it obvious that he must be in some pain, but when Aaron mentioned it he was brushed off.

“It’s nothing” Andrew insisted “Let’s go”

Aaron knew his brother was lying but refrained for pointing it out. For now. After Neil was completely taken care of, he would give Andrew a proper checkup.  He moved towards Matt, who was deeply asleep and was more difficult to rouse. Once he was awake, however, he quickly stood up and moved to help Aaron with whatever he needed. The three men walked back towards Neil’s room. Both men stared at the redhead’s still frame and it downed on Aaron that after so many hours patching him up, and all the things he had seen as a physician, he might have not noticed how grisly the redhead looked with all of his darkening bruises, patchwork skin and bandaged limbs, but it must be a shock for Matt and Andrew. They recovered quickly though and moved to the edge of the bed to await their instructions.

“I need to do something to his femur that’s called a reduction, which just means that I need to use my hands to put the bone back on it’s socket in the pelvis. It’s going to hurt like hell, so I need one of you to use all your weight to keep him immobilized to avoid any sudden movements that could damage the joints even more. The other one is going to help me apply the necessary force to put his hipbone back in place.”

“I’ll hold Neil down” Andrew volunteered, leaving it unsaid that there was far less of a chance for Neil to lash out at him if he were to wake up.

The older of the Minyard twins climbed onto the bed, he placed Neil on his back as per Aaron’s instructions (which must be hell for the wounds on his back) and bent his knees on each side of Neil’s body at shoulder level, putting all his strength in immobilizing Neil´s upper body while being careful not to apply too much force in any of his major injuries, which was a gargantuan task, considering that Neil was pretty much _entirely_ a major injury.

Aaron and Matt positioned themselves at the foot of the bed. Matt placed one of his hands on Neil’s less injured leg to keep it steady, while the other moved to where Aaron indicated the most pressure would be required. Aaron lifted the injured leg off the bed and placed it in the necessary angle, he took a deep breath and turned to Matt.

“I’m going to count to three and then I’ll let Neil’s leg hang over the edge of the bed and apply force to the joint. I’ll apply force at the femur, Matt, I need you to place your hand on Neil’s lower leg and push with all your strength in the same direction as me, got it?”

“Yeah. I’ll do my best”

“I’m sure you will” Aaron steadied himself and checked his balance so that he wouldn’t jostle Neil unnecessarily “One. Two. Three!” Putting as much force into it as he was capable of, Aaron started to pull at the damaged leg in the same direction as the bone beginning with a sloe pull and gradually increasing his strength, pulling harder and harder, when this amount of traction proved insufficient -as he had assumed it would- Matt’s larger body provided him with additional force and Aaron finally started to feel the contracted muscles start to stretch slightly.

And that was when Neil woke up.

He shot awake with a bloodcurdling shriek that made him wince and began thrashing so desperately that he and Matt quickly stopped applying pressure for fear of injuring his leg further and promptly tried to subdue him so that he wouldn’t pull at his stitches.

 “STOP!” He screamed, with a voice so broken and scratchy it was difficult to believe it was his.

“Stop! I can’t! _Please!_ ” He lashed out in obvious distress, hitting and kicking whatever he could reach. Andrew was doing his level best to restrain him and had gotten a fist to the face for his efforts.

“Neil! Neil, calm down! It’s me!” Andrew called in vain.

“No! Not again! Don’t!” he screeched, drawing strength from his despair and savagely clawing at Andrew with sharp nails, raising long, bloody gashes on the blonde’s face and neck, he kept clawing, kicking and screaming like a wounded, feral beast and the three men were having trouble restraining him.

Unable to break free, Neil kept fighting and begging for his invisible assailants to stop, and once he seemed to realize the futility of his efforts he completely broke down, tears falling from his face and gut-wrenching sobs escaping his mouth, further straining his already labored breathe.

“Not again” he sobbed, thrashing beneath Andrew’s hold “Don’t touch me. Please, no more”

“It’s me” Andrew repeated “Neil, look at me. It’s Andrew. I won’t hurt you”

Andrew saw the moment a flash of recognition crossed those glassy, tear-stained eyes, but the realization didn’t have the desired effect. Instead, Neil struggled to free himself from the blonde’s hold with renewed vigor.

“DON’T TOUCH ME!” he bellowed “GET AWAY!”

Andrew felt as if the breath had been knocked out of him. Sucker-punched at the notion that _he_ could cause Neil to lash out with an even more visceral reaction than before.

Would Neil blame him for what happened to him, then? Once he was fully conscious.

In his shock, he loosened his hold on the redhead, and that was all that was needed for Neil to get an arm free and push him away, toppling him onto the floor.

By the time Andrew pulled himself together, it was Matt’s larger body that was restraining Neil, while Aaron rummaged through his medicine bag in a frenzy until he retrieved a big, green glass bottle. He uncorked it and tried to feed some of its contents to Neil, who screamed even louder and thrashed frantically, making it impossible for Aaron to pour the contents down his throat.

“No!” he cried “Don’t make me! _No no no no!_ ” His tears feel faster and his sobbing intensified.

“ANDREW” Aaron called “Help me!”

Andrew sprang into action, taking hold of Neil’s head with one hand and immobilizing his face with the other. Aaron moved towards them and pinched Neil’s nose, restraining his airways, once the shorter main was forced to open his mouth to breathe, Aaron poured the laudanum draught directly into his mouth, releasing his nose and placing his palm into the redhead’s mouth so that he couldn’t spit the medicine back up.

 It took about a minute before Neil slumped boneless onto the bed, his body relaxed with drug induced unconsciousness.

The three of them were left shaken by Neil’s outburst, but Aaron was the fastest to recover. Convinced that Neil wouldn’t wake up anytime soon with that dose of sedation, he resumed his work on the redhead’s hip and with Matt’s help, finally managed to realign the hip joint. The area was heavily bruised and swollen, but Aaron didn’t see anything out of the ordinary, so he immobilized the hip and leg with a wooden splint that he held in place with bandages and flax string, and then stuffed it with felt and wool. With Matt’s help, they managed to maneuver Neil onto his side to help his back and placed blankets and pillows under him to stabilize his injured side.

Afterwards, Aaron checked Neil’s stitched and bandages. His outburst had pulled on some of them, but miraculously, none had torn. Once there was no more to be done for Neil, Aaron motioned for them to step out so that they could rest, he also needed to check the claw marks on Andrew’s body.

Once back in the common room, Matt plopped down onto an armchair and slumped into it, sighing in exhaustion. Andrew sat down too, but he was tense and pale. Aaron moved towards him with antiseptic and bandages, but his twin motioned at him to stop.

“I’m fine” Andrew said, and then winced at his use of Neil’s trademark phrase.

“Obviously you’re not” Aron said, sitting beside him and rubbing antiseptic into the gashes on his neck, hands and arms.

“You’re not going to need bandages or stitches, these are only superficial scratches”

Andrew shrugged in indifference “Will he be all right now?”

Aaron sighed “I told you. I’ve done all I can. He won’t bleed to death now, and I cleaned his wounds as best I could. But we still need to watch out for infections and until he’s fully conscious I can’t really say in the concussion did any major damage. But I doubt it”

Andrew remained still and quiet clearly unable to process the events of a few minutes ago, then finally he looked back at him.

“Thank you” he said.

“What?” Aaron replied stunned.

“You’ve never liked him. Never given a shit about him. But you saved him. Because I asked you. You know what he means to me and you saved his life, so thank you.”

“I had to. You made him my patient and put his life in my hands. It doesn’t matter how I feel about him, I’ll make sure he makes it out of this alive.”

Matt turned to look at the twins and then managed to voice his question “Andrew, how did this happen?”

“I told you. It was Riko. He did this to Neil in exchange of giving me back my freedom” He told them about the hours of hearing Neil screaming from his cell. He told them about the guard taunting him and then Jean telling him about the deal Neil struck with warden Wright and Riko Moriyama. He told them of the seemingly endless walk towards Neil cell and the horror that he found once he reached his lover.

“How could they do that?” Matt asked incredulous “What kind of monsters are they”

“The kind that won’t roam this earth much longer” Andrew stated simply.

Matt and Aaron both stared at him in disbelief.

“You can’t be serious” Aaron hissed “Neil just went through hell to get you out of prison for _hitting_ Lord Moriyama, what do you think will happen after you murder a high born noble and the chief law enforcer of a prison?!”

“You’re assuming I’ll get caught” Andrew replied, before getting up and walking away towards Neil’s room.

Aaron huffed in exasperation and moved towards Matt, who was waiting for him with open arms. He collapsed onto his lovers embrace and hugged him, hiding his neck on the crook of the other’s neck.

“He’s still critical Matt” Aaron said, managing to suppress a sob. _Damn_ Neil. Damn him to hell. He saved his brother, he put himself through hell and managed what he had been unable to do. He gave Andrew his freedom back, at a cost that Aaron could not say he would have payed. And now Aaron was responsible for his life. His life was a joke.

“You did your best” Matt reassured him, placing a kiss to his temple “And I’m sure you’ll keep doing so.”

“I’m so tired” Aaron mumbled. He would need to go back and check on Neil in a couple of hours, to look for signs of fever, shock or atrophy in the fractures. But right now, he felt about ready to pass out…

“Sleep a little, love. I’m sure Andrew will come looking for you if anything happens, and if not, then I’ll wake you up in a couple of hours, right?”

“Right” Aaron confirmed softly, succumbing to sleep in the safety of Matt’s arms.

There was a long road ahead for them all.

 

(A/N: [A gorgeous moodboard for this fic](https://booksaboutgay.tumblr.com/post/173090289021/has-anyone-read-a-faustian-bargain-by))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there we go! Please let me know what you think. Right now my_unlikely_hero and I are working on a prompt we got on tumblr. Can't say much since it's a surprise, but expect lots of angst (it's us) If you have a prompt or comment please don't hesitate to reach out at my tumblr: headbanging-nightrunner :)
> 
> Also: Expect slower updates since this teacher is approaching the end of the school year which means: Finals, PTA's end of school festivals and the like :) But I'll keep working on this!


	5. Nightmares and fever dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil is in a delirium of fever. While Andrew is plagued by nightmares. 
> 
> Sorry for the long wait between updates everyone. As a junior high english teacher my past few weeks have been hectic, and I still have 3 weeks of classes to go...so yeah! hopefully this chapter makes up for it? I also have a new AU! for this fandom coming up (a lot less sexual violence, thank you very much) but I can't really say much yet, hopefully you'll like it.
> 
> Same warnings as always: Graphic depictions of torture, less graphic allusions to past rape

There were hands on him. He could feel hands everywhere. They were around his throat, robbing him of every breath, they held him down forcing him to lie on the mattress. There were hands on his shoulders and hips and legs and the hands brought pain.

So much pain, it was a blazing inferno flowing through is bloodstream, it was a piercing agony that ran deep in his bones. He didn’t understand what was happening, he was used to pain, it had been all he knew for a long time. It had been one of the few things to remain constant in his early life. But this felt so different.

Then came the memories, bits and pieces scattered amongst the fog of pain. He could see Riko and Wright, and those guards when the Lord Moriyama got bored. He remembered the lashes, blades, choking and the horrifying and reluctant pleasure and pain fucked out of him for hours.

He hoped he would die, he wanted to. In his brief moments of lucidness, he understood that this pain was nothing, it was a pale shadow of what he would feel when the haze of sleep and painkillers passed, he also realized that once he woke up he would have to face Andrew.

‘Andrew…’

Neil would never regret his choice since it had saved his monster’s life, neither of them believed in regret, it was a useless emotion, but he couldn’t stop himself from feeling shame. Shame at what he had let those men do to him, shame that he had _enjoyed_ some of it, shame that he had been conscious enough to the heartbreak and horror in Andrew’s eyes upon finding him.

And even more, shame that, for that one brief moment of disoriented panic he had mixed up Andrew with _them_. When his wits returned enough for him to distinguish Andrew’s voice and his attempts at reassurance he had felt a stab of dread course through him, even knowing that the blonde was trying to help him. He had been scared of Andrew even after recognizing him.

He was scared of ever knowing how badly he had broken Andrew’s heart and how deeply these new scars ran, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know if his monster could ever forgive him, and definitely didn’t ever want to see pity or disgust reflected in those hazel eyes.

Pain and blood, blood and pain. These two things had been a constant all through his life, they had shaped his childhood and made him into the man he was. If this was only about pain and blood he would have easily been able to recover from it, maybe a little worse for wear and with a blonde midget glaring and raging at his side, but he would have been able to pull through.

This though, it went far beyond the physical torment. He had ransomed his own integrity for Andrew’s freedom and betrayed their promises to each other in the process, he had willingly begged and moaned and done everything else his captors had demanded to then cry and scream and plead for mercy. He had tried not to lose sight of what was at stake, who he had done this for; and whenever they had taunted him by asking if _he_ was worth all that pain he had always said ‘yes’.

Except by the end, he had hesitated. As he was passed around those men for Riko’s further entertainment, he had asked himself if it was worth it, and _that_ had been the thing to finally break him. Because in that moment, he had doubted Andrew’s subtle and indirect affection, he had hesitated and questioned their bond.

 _‘This is nothing’_ he had once told him…

They had made him doubt Andrew, they had shattered his resolve and broken him along the way. And what was worse, they had made it so that he did not want to be put back together.

Neil wanted to let go.

For some reason, he thought of his mother. Of how she would have beat him black and blue for allowing himself to fall so stupidly in love for anyone, and then she would have killed him for putting himself through this agony. And all for _love,_ after everything she had warned him about.

He was lulled into further unconsciousness by Aaron's painkillers and he allowed himself to dwell there, in that haze of drugged sleep where he could fool himself into believing that this whole ordeal had never really happened, he could dream that his monster, Nicky and Aaron were all just preparing for a new day like any other, with their dull jobs and monotonous but satisfying lives. Lives they had earned after all the blood and suffering they had been dealt.

This false sense of calm didn't last very long though, all too soon he began to feel stabs of pain gradually piercing through the thick veil of sleep that protected him, he felt cold and it was very hard to breath, he wanted to move, he needed to run away from it all, but there was a terrible weight pushing him down, rendering him immobile, his entire body throbbed with pain and when he finally located his eyelids, but when he tried to lift them he found that even that simple action required an incredible amount of effort.

When he was finally able to open his eyes, he realized that he was no longer in that dreadful cell, that much was obvious. But the room was dark enough that he couldn’t make out any details as to where he was, and that was almost enough to send him into a panic, as if sensing his rising fear, a figure materialized beside him, and he finally understood.

He was home.

The edges of his vision were blurry and dark spots danced around his eyes, so he didn’t think he would stay awake for too long, but maybe just enough to be told what had happened while he was passed out.

Aaron- it had to be Aaron since he was the only one who could treat him- approached him. He placed a bowl by the nightstand and collapsed onto a chair at the head of the bed, hazel eyes looked down at him and the only thing he could read in them was anger. That told Neil nothing, Aaron was always angry at him.

He parted his lips to ask a question, but his voice failed him, there was glass scrapping at his throat, and he was dismayed to realize that even _talking_ would be painful now, but he managed somehow.

“Why?” he demanded weakly ‘Why did you save me?’ ‘Why couldn’t you just let me go’

A flicker of emotion shadowed that stoic face when he first talked with his broken voice, then blonde eyebrows raised briefly in confusion “What?”

He tried again, with a different question than those he really wanted to ask.

“Why am I here?”

 Aaron merely stared

* * *

 

As Andrew walked into the room with a bowl of fresh water As Andrew walked into the room with a bowl of fresh water and rags, he noticed the moment Neil’s eyelids began to flutter, he hurried across the threshold and next to the redhead’s bed. His lover opened his eyes, his gaze shifted rapidly from one point to another, probably trying to discern where he was. He noticed the moment panic and confusion started to set in so he moved with heavy steps, calling Neil’s attention to him, he sat down and put the bowl of cool water on the nightstand before turning back to look at his idiot.

After recent events, Andrew found that anger was his default status. He couldn’t help it, each time he laid eyes on Neil’s battered body, a new flash of rage coursed through him. He hated Riko and Wright, he hated himself, sometimes he even hated Neil’s martyr complex.

He stared at Neil, who parted his lips to try and talk, but only a faint broken sound came out. Neil closed his mouth, pursing his lips slightly and wincing when even that small action brought him discomfort, and then he tried to speak again, this time with better results.

“Why?” Neil asked, besides the confusion Andrew thought he perceived a hint of sadness, but it was hard to read the redhead’s expression when his eyes were nearly sealed shut with the swelling and bruising that marred most of his face.

The question caught him off guard. ‘Why?’ What? Why had he survived? That was thanks to Neil’s dumb luck and Aaron’s medical knowledge, why was he in their bed? Where else could he be placed while he healed? Another possibility occurred to him, thinking of Neil’s violent reaction at his touch earlier, even when he had recognized who exactly was touching him.

‘Why are you still here?’ was that was he was trying to ask? Would Neil be unable to stand his touch or even the sight of him from now on? Unwilling to put up with his own dark thoughts, he focused his attention back to the redhead, attempting to understand what was going through that idiot head of his.

“What?’” he asked, trying to make sense of the situation.

The broken rasp that escaped Neil’s lips was barely audible and sounded so hoarse it was obviously painful. It made Andrew go back to those endless hours trapped in his cell, listening to his idiot’s painful shrieks and bloodcurdling screams. He hoped he was able to fully hide the wince that Neil’s broken voice had prompted.

Neil didn’t notice, too preoccupied trying to say the sentence that sent Andrew reeling.

“Why am I here?” he managed weakly, glazed blue orbs looking at him without really seeing, clouded by his growing fever.

Andrew stared for a moment, unsure about the answer Neil was expecting from him.

He took a towel and dipped it into the bowl’s cool water, wringing it in one hand to get rid of the excess, he placed the wet rag into Neil’s forehead and felt the others powerful shudder under his palm, he was pale and shaky despite the many blankets cocooning him.

“We had to treat your wounds” Andrew states plainly “Where else could you be?”

Neil’s head moved briefly from one side to the other, in a half-hearted attempt to shake his head, so he apparently got Neil’s meaning wrong.

“I gave him back to you, why couldn’t you just let me go?”

As Neil pushed the words out, his breath hitched and his breathing became a bit more labored, obviously straining with effort.

“What the hell are you talking about?!” Was Neil honestly implying that he would rather be dead, how could the damn martyr even consider that taking himself away from him was ok. How could the idiot think that Andrew could live without him?

“I gave you your brother back” Neil wheezed “I saved him, but I didn’t want you to save me”

It hit him then, Neil was only telling him this because his addled brain made him think he was talking to Aaron due to the confusion brought by the fever.

Having his worst fear confirmed felt like a bucket of ice water being poured directly into the core of his being. He had expected Neil to be traumatized and devastated, but after Nathan he never thought that anything could break him past the point of no return. Until now.

Riko and Wright would die, a slow a painful death that would never be enough to quench the rage he felt.

He wetted the rag in Neil’s forehead again, barely able to contain the emotions clawing at his throat. He briefly ran his fingers between tangled copper hair before taking one of Neil’s hands in his own, somehow managing to bite out an answer.

“I’m not Aaron, and fuck you for ever thinking I would let you go”

A choked sob caught on Neil’s chest, a single tear sliding down his face as his eyes closed back into unconsciousness with a soft mutter of ‘right’.

As the night progressed, Neil’s health took a turn for the worst. His fever rose to a dangerous level and sweat ran down his frame freely, making his hair and clothes cling to his body, his breathing was more and more labored and whenever Andrew checked his pulse like Aaron had taught him, it hammered against his fingertips, as if it was trying to break through the skin.

Neil managed to wake up again a couple of times, but he was visibly confused and the sounds that came from his abused throat made no sense, he would look around -or at least attempt to- in obvious panic, before exhausting himself and passing out again.

Aaron came by before dawn, walking straight to Neil’s bed and placing him gently on his side to remove the bandages that covered the whip marks on his back. Aaron hisses at what he says beneath the stained white gauze and when Matt walks in to bring him more antiseptic and bandages, his mouth sets in a thin line.

Andrew understands why once he approaches. the welts on Neil’s back are swollen and puffy and their color is an angry shade of red that leeks a pale-yellow fluid.

“These cuts are way too hot, and they are not healing properly” Aaron is carefully examining the wounds with his hands, he has fished out the thinnest of his knives from the medical bag and he runs it over a flame before pouring some alcohol into it.

“What’s that for?” Andrew asks, unsure of what his brother is planning to do

“I need to reopen and dress the wounds before I use any medicine, if he’s going to have even the slightest chance of fighting of this infection”

Andrew grimaces and Aaron seems to notice “I know. Believe it or not, I don’t want to cause him any more pain if it can be avoided, but in this case it’s really important”

“Will he wake up?”

Aaron shakes his head “He’s too far gone with the fever for that, I told you there was a very big chance this would happen, with so many injuries, and the blood loss isn’t helping, but he’s a stubborn fucker, he’ll pull through”

“Not if he wants to die” Andrew states in a hollow voice.

“What?” Matt and Andrew asked in confused unison.

Andrew fists clench at his sides “He was conscious earlier, just for a few minutes. I came back from fetching cool water for his forehead and he talked to me a little”.

“Isn’t that a good sign?” Matt said, looking from one sibling to the other.

Aaron shrugged, his shoulders sagging with uncertainty “It’s hard to say with patients like Neil. I’ve seen people bounce back from a gut shot and others die of an abscessed tooth”

Aaron’s attention returned to his brother. He was sure there was a reason behind the haunted look in his eyes and the last comment he made “What did he say?”

“He thought I was you”

Aaron snorts “Insulting even in his sickbed, can’t say I’m surprised”

Andrew ignores the jab “He asked me why I couldn’t just let him die since I ‘got my brother back’ because he didn’t want to be saved”.

Andrew heard Matt’s sharp intake of breath as well as Aaron’s cursing and for that one short moment felt grateful of their presence, even if it was in such a dark time.

“Shit” Aaron hissed “You think he’s trying to let himself die?”

Matt swallowed, visibly rattled “that can’t be, Neil’s been tortured before, and he’s pulled through”

Andrew just shrugged, looking from Aaron to Matt and back again “You can’t compare one type of torture to another, Riko and Wright knew what they were doing, and they broke Neil to the point where he resents being alive after what happened to him”

“If he pulls though” Aaron said, hesitant but hopeful “He’ll have an even longer path ahead towards recovery”

Andrew gave one sharp nod, he understood, better than anyone else, how difficult it was to come back from this type of trauma. Neil had been humiliated and degraded, tortured physically and mentally, all the while knowing that he had no way out if he wanted to protect what was dearest to him. He had been powerless, and hopeless.

But never again.

Matt and Aaron finished draining and redressing the lash marks on Neil’s back, as well as making sure that the wounds in his thighs and the rest of his body, as well as his dislocated hip were still healing properly, giving no additional trouble to Neil’s precarious health.

“I’ll come back in two hours” Aaron informed, staring intently at his brother “You should try and get some sleep”

“I don’t want to sleep” it took a lot of effort for Andrew to admit it, and the confession was hissed between clenched teeth.

“You have to. I won’t have you collapsing too, giving me even more work” Aaron leaned into Matt as he said it. He knew his brother, coaxing or asking politely would get him nowhere, he needed to be blunt and harsh if he expected to get anywhere.

“I’m taking care of Neil because he really needs it, but if you make yourself collapse by running yourself ragged, I’ll just let you fall on your ass and then ask Matt to look after you”

The taller man shrugged “I’ve been told I make a poor nurse”

Andrew ignored their attempt at humor and turned his full attention back to Neil, the men took that as their cue to leave and simply reminded Andrew to notify them is there was any significant change to Neil’s health, otherwise they would come back at the scheduled time, Andre merely waved them away while staring at his idiot’s pale, shivering frame.

He must have been more tired that he had wanted to admit, since he eventually nodded off while sitting stiffly in that uncomfortable chair.

Nightmares plagued his restless sleep. First, he dreamed of that cursed cell in the Palmetto prison, Neil’s screams resounding in his ears, piercing through his body and making his heart beat so hard it was painful, as Neil’s shrill cries intensified, the walls bleed, filling his tiny room with blood until Andrew was swimming in it, choking on it, fighting desperately for every gulp of air, and just as he thought he was about to die drowning in blood, drowning in _Neil’s_ blood, a black void encased him and he was falling so fast his stomach churned with a horrible sinking sensation.

Then he came into his senses again and wished he had really drowned before. He was chained to a brick wall, he could feel the shackles digging into his skin, the iron links dug into his throat and constricted his airways. But what truly left Andrew frozen in place, fighting to stave of his terror, what the scene that he was being forced to watch.

Neil was in front of him, naked and vulnerable. He wasn’t yelling anymore, but his mouth was still open in a silent scream as Riko and Wright hit him, flayed his back and tortured him for hours and hours taking turns to brutally force themselves on him while Neil let out the most pitiful chocked sounds the blonde had ever heard as he laid underneath the man, body motionless and gaze vacant as an ever increasing pool of blood soaked into the cot and painted the skins of both Lord and Warden crimson as Andrew roared and fought against his binds to no avail.

There was a moment of blinding panic as Riko’s message played in Andrew’s head, making his ears ring with the poison of the words.

´ _This one’s on you’_

´ _This one’s on you…’_

Andrew’s fear threatened to consume him as the world around him shifted, he felt the restrains falling away as Riko and Wright faded from the picture.

That was when all of Andrew’s worst fears materialized, because it was no longer those bastards hurting Neil. It was him. This time, it was Andrew hovering menacingly on top of Neil, sinking teeth into flesh, cutting into the ivory skin as he heard himself laugh and laugh. Trapped inside his own body, he became a monster like those that had plagued his childhood and haunted his dreams. Caged within his own mind, screaming at himself to stop, he felt a manic grin spread across his lips as he encircled Neil’s throat with his hands, choking each breath out of the read head as he plunged inside him, feeling a tingle spread down his spine as Neil’s silent tears feel and those empty eyes looked into his face.

_‘I didn’t want you to save me’_

Neil’s weak voice snapped him out of his twisted euphoria and as he looked down into those glazed blue orbs, he noticed the blade in his hand. It was the kodachi that Andrew had pulled out of Neil’s body and as his grip around the hilt tightened, Andrew predicted what was about to happen next and found himself unable to stop it. Bound by the helpless futility of his dream.

His arm swang in a wide arch and the blade of short sword embedded itself on Neil’s chest, the redhead’s eyes widened and he choked on his own blood, gasping for breath as red foam pooled on his mouth and ran past his lips and for a brief moment that pale blue gaze cleared and looked at him.

There was pain in those eyes, and consternation, but what crushed Andrew was the love. The love and _gratitude_ he saw as those eyes glazed over and his body went still.

Andrew screamed.

He jolted awake with a choked cry but managed to stop himself before his scream could call Aaron and Matt’s attention to him. He gasped for breath as his heart hammered in his chest, each painful heartbeat pulsing in his ears.

He looked down at his clenched hands and for a moment he thought he saw blood running between his fingers, but it was gone once he blinked, for a second, he didn’t remember what he had dreamt, but it all came back after he turned to look at Neil.

_‘I didn’t want you to save me’_

The contents of his nightmares all came crushing down on him, along with the images of Neil flinching away from his touch, screaming at him to not touch him, and it was then that it finally downed on him.

If Neil pulled through- _When_ Neil pulled through damn it! He would hate him. Hate him for letting himself be condemn to death row. Hate him for the torment he had lived under Riko in order to save him- He had always known the lengths Neil could go through to protect what was his, they were one and the same in that regard. And then, he would most likely also hate him for forcing him to keep living after all he’d been through

The weight of this newest realization threatened to crush him, until Neil’s labored wheezing called his attention, he stood up automatically, without even realizing what he was doing and hesitantly pressed his hand to Neil’s forehead, as if afraid that the redhead would wake up from his fevered delirium to get as far away from Andrew as possible.

Neil was burning even hotter that he had before Andrew feel asleep and each wheezing breath sounded painful and labored. Andrew placed a cold rag quickly into Neil’s boiling brow and rushed out of the room, numbly making his way to the common room where Matt and Aaron where dozing side by side.

Aaron startled awake at the lightest touch of his arm -physicians needed to be fully awake quickly, in case there was an emergency at any time- and his sudden movement promptly roused Matt as well.

“What?” the taller man asked groggily.

“Neil got worse” was all he said.

The statement brought Andrew and Matt to full attention in a flash.

“What are his symptoms?” Aaron asked, falling back into the clinical detachment that had been his default for the last how many hours.

“His fever is a lot higher, and his breathing is a lot more shallow and labored, I checked him like you taught me and he’s using the… the auxiliary muscles? To breathe.

Aaron’s face fell slightly and though Matt didn’t understand completely he tensed when he understood that it wasn’t good.

“Accessory muscles” Aaron corrected with a quick nod “Yeah, that’s not a great sign, but he can still pull through” Andrew knew that Aaron’s try at reassurance was a rare attempt at support but he was too stunned to respond to it, he stood there, frozen in place as Aaron Matt moved towards Neil’s room and made no move to follow after them.

He felt an intense gaze on him and looked up to see Matt turned back towards him, worry and fear clear on his tired face.

“Are you coming” Matt wondered.

Andrew shook his head “I-I can’t. I need to…”

Andrew didn’t really know how to finish that sentence. He needed to what? He needed to escape his own head after realizing Neil might despise him once he recovered? He needed to gouge his own heart out for foolishly letting himself dream? He needed to…. He needed to run away from it all.

He didn’t have to say anything though, Matt seemed to understand nodding at him in sympathy.

“I’ll come look for you once Aaron’s done. I’ll let you know how Neil’s doing” Matt purposefully walked away after that, without another look back in his direction.

Andrew let his feet move of their own volition and found himself in the kitchen. He grabbed the fullest bottle of spirits available and a glass, but then he let the glass fall onto the floor and shatter into a million pieces before he walked back into the common room, as he sank onto the couch, he allowed a numbness he hadn’t felt in many years, lull him into a haze of detachment as he took a huge swig from the flask, drinking himself into a stupor, not allowing himself to think of the increasing chance of Neil not living through the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you might have noticed, there's now a chapter count on this fic. It's tentative, I've honestly lost sight of where I wanted to go with this story, hence why I've started to work on a new AU, to see if that gets me out of the slump I'm in with AFB. Please leave a comment if there's anything you would like to see and as always, my tumblr is open to prompts with the same username that I have here

**Author's Note:**

> First fanfic for this fandom. Please let me know what you think about it!


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